A Lesson in Something That's Not Quite Love
by Mara Potter
Summary: Chapter 13- It's sort of random, and Draco is sort of nice. But all that will change. How did it go from sex education to this, I wonder?
1. Default Chapter

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: *Sigh* It's not mine.  
  
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"God, what the hell was I thinking?" wondered Hermione. "Why wasn't I just paying attention today? Now I'm stuck in detention… with Malfoy? Ugh, I know what I was thinking about. Ron. Yep, Ron. And how we almost had sex last night but I ran away scared from him. And then he broke up with me. Why did he break up with me?" Hermione adjusted the strap of her white tank top. God, this room was so insanely hot. Couldn't Snape just have opened a window? She'd already removed her uniform shirt and was just in a tank top, but she still had on her navy skirt and socks and shoes.  
  
  
  
Hermione continued to wash out the bottle she was currently working on. Her and Malfoy's detention had been to clean every one of Snape's empty potion bottles. Something like two hundred of them, if her calculations had been correct. Some of her frizzy hair slid out of her bun and into her eyes. God, it was so hot in here.  
  
"How did I get stuck in a four hour detention with him?" Hermione thought miserably. As if this hadn't been the worst weekend of her life. Failing that transfiguration exam, that whole thing with Ron, and now this? She closed her eyes, thinking back. Ron had been so sweet, so nice and understanding with her. And she had been all ready to sleep with him, but somewhere along the way she just realized that she knew absolutely nothing about what she was going to do. She had no idea how to please a guy.  
  
"Despite all my Cosmopolitan reading, it's not much help unless you've tried it out on someone." She thought. Hermione closed her eyes. The strap of her bra slid down her shoulder and she quickly swept it back under her shirt. She closed her eyes and tried to remember all the details of her misadventure with Ron, wondering if she'd made the right decision.  
  
"Of course it's not the right idea to run out on a guy when you're both naked in his bed." Hermione leaned her head on her knees. "I just need some rest." Hermione closed her eyes for just a minute….  
  
SPLOSH- "OW!" she cried. Draco had thrown his sponge at her, and it hit her right in the stomach.  
  
"Asshole." She said, throwing it back. "What the fuck is your problem, Malfoy?"  
  
"You were slacking, Granger. I really need to get out of here. I've got more pressing things waiting in my bedroom for me." Draco replied.  
  
"Jackass." She mumbled. Hermione continued to wash her bottles, scrubbing them to get her frustrations out.  
  
"God." Draco said. "I didn't realize what a bitch you were." Hermione ignored him, and once more picked up her falling bra strap. "What the hell is wrong with you today?" he asked.  
  
"What the hell do you care?" she asked.  
  
"See, this is what I'm talking about. Total bitch." He said.  
  
"Why would you care what's wrong with me?" she asked.  
  
"Because I'm genuinely concerned about your overall well-being." He said sarcastically. "I just figured if you're not in a pissy mood we'll get out of here faster." Instead of replying, Hermione chose to head over to the wall and open the window.  
  
"I don't like being stuck here with you. You don't like being stuck here with me." Hermione said. "Let's just clean these stupid bottles and get out of here." She said, heading back to the table she'd been working on. "OW!" she cried again as she felt Malfoy's hand strike her butt.  
  
"What the fuck was that?" she asked.  
  
"Just what I thought." He said.  
  
"Just what you thought what?" Hermione demanded. "Why are you such an idiot?" she yelled at him. Malfoy just smiled and shook his head. Hermione sat down, her back to Malfoy. She suddenly started as she felt a hand on the bare part of her back.  
  
"Problems in the bedroom with that sweet little boyfriend of yours?"  
  
"Like I'd ever share any detail of my personal life with you." Hermione said.  
  
"Oh, but you might want to." He said.  
  
"Malfoy, just please go back to cleaning your bottles. I really just want to get out of here." He walked around her and sat across the table from her.  
  
"Did you and Ron have sex?" he asked. Hermione started at him.  
  
"You're disgusting." She said. "Please just get back to work." He picked up her bucket and moved it to the side.  
  
"Because I don't think you slept with him." He said.  
  
"Did I ask for your opinion?" she asked. "You are such a fucking idiot."  
  
"I think I know exactly what your problem is, Granger." He said.  
  
"I'm sure you do, Malfoy. Could you wash some fucking bottles? We've got a lot of work to do."  
  
"You're so angry… Could it be sexual frustration?" he leaned over the table to whisper in her ear. She looked up and glared at him.  
  
"No, it's not actually." She replied.  
  
"Really?" he asked. "By the way you reacted to me touching your ass, I'd say you're pretty afraid of sex, actually."  
  
"Why do you even care about my problems?" she asked. "Besides, I'm just angry that I have detention. It's been a bad weekend, and I'd like to forget it, okay? So let's just finish this, and I can get back to my room and go to sleep and try to put almost sleeping with Ron out of my mind-" Hermione realized what had just slipped from her mouth and groaned. "Shit!" she thought.  
  
"So I was right?" Draco asked. "Everything not storybook perfect with you and Mr. Weasley?"  
  
"Bite me." She said.  
  
"So you almost slept with him, huh?" Draco asked.  
  
"How long will it take you to realize I'm not going to respond to your immature comments?" she asked, pulling her bucket back and reaching for her bottles again. Draco immediately pushed it aside.  
  
"I don't really take no for an answer." He said.  
  
"Okay, Malfoy. Yes, I almost slept with Ron. But it didn't happen. I don't know if you're familiar with this, but some people like to wait for the right moment to have sex. It's not something I'm expecting you to understand, but I hope you'll shut up now." She made an attempt to return to her work, but Malfoy grabbed her arm.  
  
"So, why didn't you sleep with him?" he asked.  
  
"Um, like I'd tell you. We're not exactly close friends or anything." She said.  
  
"Come on, Granger. There might be some way I can help you out."  
  
"It's not a problem. Ron broke up with me because he knew I wasn't ready to sleep with him and he didn't trust himself to stay away from me. He didn't want me to feel pressured, so he said we should take a break. That's what's on my mind, that's the big problem. That's why I can't concentrate. So know that you know, please leave me alone and get back to cleaning." She said to Draco.  
  
"So you and Weasley aren't dating anymore?" he asked.  
  
"No, not right now." She said. "Why? Were you thinking of asking me out?" she asked sarcastically. Malfoy stifled a laugh.  
  
"No, I was just thinking about something."  
  
"I'll alert the media." She replied.  
  
"No, I mean… Granger, you know I really kind of hate you. I know you really kind of hate me. But I think we could help each other out here."  
  
"What are you talking about?" she asked.  
  
"Look. Just listen to me." He said, pulling her hands away from her work. "My father told me I had to start learning how to make my own money. So I have to pay for all my expenses for the next couple of months."  
  
"Malfoy, I cannot tell you how special that is, but how does it concern me?"  
  
"It concerns you…" he said, "because I know how I can make the money I need."  
  
"I'm not paying you anything, Malfoy, so you can just forget that idea." She said.  
  
"You might just want to hear this idea." He said. "Despite all the crap you just fed me about it not being the right moment or whatever, I know what you really need." He said.  
  
"Oh, and what's that?" she asked.  
  
"And education." He replied.  
  
"And what does it look like I'm getting at this school?" she asked.  
  
"No, I was thinking of a different type of education."  
  
"And…" Hermione said.  
  
"More like, sex education." He said.  
  
"What?" she asked, her eyes growing wide.  
  
"It's obvious, Granger, that while you may just not have been ready to have sex with Ron, you were also worried that you wouldn't know what the hell you were doing."  
  
"What makes you think that?" she asked.  
  
"Jesus, you're Hermione Granger, studious, virtuous."  
  
"And you're Draco Malfoy, you slack off and sleep around. What the hell does it matter?"  
  
"It matters because we can solve each others problems." He said.  
  
"What?" she asked.  
  
"I need money. My father's cutting me off as a life experience or some shit like that. You need help learning how to please a guy. You pay me, I'll show you what to do."  
  
"Malfoy, I am not going to make you my whore!" Hermione cried.  
  
"Don't think of it that way. I wouldn't be your whore. Come on, Granger. I know what guys like, obviously. You have no clue what guys like. I need money. You have money. We can help each other."  
  
"I don't know about this." She said.  
  
"Come on, it's not like I'd tell anyone. We'll just try it out, okay?" he said.  
  
"Malfoy, why are you doing this? I know it's for your personal gain, but it almost seems like you care about me."  
  
"Not exactly." He said. "Just think of it as us doing each other a mutual favor. I don't want you sexually or anything. I really just need money, and hey, it's doing something I'm good at." He leaned over and slid her fallen bra strap inside her shirt once more.  
  
Hermione shivered slightly at his touch. She was hesitant for a moment. "Okay. We'll try it out." She said finally. "But you cannot tell anyone, ever. And let's make sure that no matter what happens, we always hate each other. I'm just helping you, you're just helping me. They cancel each other out. We don't owe each other anything. Nothing between us changes, okay?"  
  
"Deal." Draco said. How about we meet in the empty classroom on the third floor, past the picture of the mermaid and the horses, say, next Saturday?"  
  
"Sounds good." Hermione said. "Should I uh, bring anything?' she asked.  
  
"Just your money." Draco replied.  
  
"Okay, I'll see you next week, then." Hermione said.  
  
"Next week." Said Draco.  
  
  
  
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So what do you think? I hope you don't flame me, but whatever criticism I get I take to heart, so if a flame is your honest opinion, write me one if you must. 


	2. Reflections

Rating- R  
  
Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine, but the plot is straight from my crazy mind.  
  
I don't really like this chapter, but it's part of the plot I wanted to get out of the way. And Happy Easter, if you celebrate it.  
  
  
  
Hermione's Reflections:  
  
  
  
"It's hard to admit how nervous I am right now. In less than ten hours I'll be at my first lesson with Malfoy." Hermione said to the mirror.  
  
But is this wrong or immoral somehow? Me paying Malfoy to teach me how to, well, satisfy a guy? Should this feel dirty? Because it kind of does….  
  
Just forget it, Hermione. He suggested it. So what if it seems corrupt somehow. It's funny, though, who would have thought, Draco Malfoy needing money, and getting it from Hermione Granger?"  
  
Hermione glanced at the clothes strewn across her bed once more. Why was it so hard to pick something to wear? "Why should I worry about impressing him?" She finally decided to just get some breakfast and come back to the decision later.  
  
"Oh wait, where did I hide the bag I keep my spare money in?" she wondered. Parvati and Lavender were always coming into her room to borrow something, and, while she trusted the somewhat, she didn't feel comfortable just leaving her money lying around. "Oh, I remember. In the closet." She said, after thinking for a minute. Hermione opened the door to her closet and spotted the purple velvet bag. She stood on her tiptoes to retrieve it.  
  
"Arg, almost got it, umph." She said, stretching to her limits. The bag appeared to be stuck under something. "How did I get this up here in the first place?" she wondered. She gave it a final tug, and the bag came loose and toppled to the floor, bringing a box of pictures down with it. The bag fell with a soft clunk on the floor, but the box burst open and the pictures scattered everywhere.  
  
Hermione tossed the bag on her bed and sighed, then bent down to gather up the photos. These were the non-moving kind, from her trip to visit her cousin Anna in Manhattan. She leafed through them quickly, the scenes from the photos bringing back nice memories from her past summer. She stuffed them back in the box and shoved it into the back of her closet, not bothering with getting it back on the shelf.  
  
She was just heading over to count out some money to take when a picture she had missed caught her eye. Hermione bent down to pick it up, only to gasp when she saw what it contained. "No, no I threw all these away." She whispered. "I threw all of them away." Her hand trembled a bit and she quickly shoved the picture into the trash can. Then she slowly sat down on her bed, recollecting her thoughts. "I threw all of those away, I know I did. I know I did." She whispered. A tear landed on her arm before she even realized she'd been crying. "I don't want to remember anything about him. He doesn't deserve anything more from me." She smiled sadly. "He took enough in the first place."  
  
Chuck Richardson. Sex god extraordinaire and king of the city. Just one look at this guy, and you could know you'd never sleep again until you got more of him. Anna had warned her about Chuck, but something about him; she just couldn't stay away. Hermione closed her eyes, unwilling to relive the whole thing. "To make a long story short, I slept with him, and the day after I found out he'd used me and had never loved me, even though he told me he did." She said out loud. "God, why did it take me five fucking months in therapy to be able to say that?"  
  
"So basically several months and a few nightmares later, I'd forgotten about him." Thought Hermione.  
  
She'd never told anyone. She hadn't even told Anna how far things had gotten with them. Ron certainly didn't know about her and Chuck. She wasn't afraid to tell him because he'd think she was a slut or something. She knew Ron would never do that. It was just, it had taken her so long to forget what had happened, she was afraid if she had to relive the whole summer she wouldn't be able to get over it again.  
  
"I don't know if I'm that strong." She thought. Now, desperately in need of some food, she headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast.  
  
Draco's Reflections:  
  
"Less than ten hours until we start this thing." He thought. Draco was still in bed, lying on his black sheets in just his boxers, the blankets barely covering his bare chest (sorry, couldn't resist the mental picture).  
  
To be honest, he didn't really know what Hermione expected him to teach her. To kiss? Touch? More, maybe?  
  
"All that really matters is I get my money." He thought, frowning. In all of his sixteen years, he'd never had to know what it was like to want. Any girl he wanted, he could have. Any sort of room, or teacher, or grade he wanted. His. So why was Lucius suddenly acting like such a parent to him, trying to teach him to budget and shit like that?  
  
"God, the bitch better pay well." He thought, rolling out of bed and reaching for his pants. Not that he wouldn't enjoy this little setup with Hermione. She would definitely get her money's worth, the whole Malfoy experience. He could have a little fun with her, wreak a little havoc on her senses, his specialty. It could be very fun to help the virtuous girl enter a world completely opposite her own. Yes, he could have a good time doing this, actually.  
  
Just as long as he got some fucking money.  
  
************  
  
Well, I did my best with the deep thoughts.  
  
The next chapter will be their first session, as things go along I may have to up the rating…. What would you think about that?  
  
Reviews are, as always, welcome!  
  
************  
  
I couldn't believe I got 27 reviews for one chapter! Thank you all so much!  
  
Key, Kasumi Greenleaf, Shakespeare Diva, Stargirl, Megan, Noelle, Angel, Jewels, Dragon 31, bumblebee, Alanna Roseguard, Sucker for Romance, Mione G, Draco's gurl, neato, Icy Stormz, Sai, Arwen Undomiel, Athena's Quill, twisted sister, Hellbound, Hermione M., and Coffee for reviewing.  
  
And I wanted to respond to one or two ppl…  
  
Starshine- I didn't know if that was dumbfounded good or bad, if good, I'm glad you liked it, if bad, thanks for being honest and giving my story a try.  
  
DarkAngel009988- I felt that way about her talking, too. But I figured it wasn't that bad, and she was just supposed to be in a bad mood. For the most part she won't be swearing like that, so I hope you keep reading. 


	3. Lesson 1

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Or the song "My Favorite Things." I kind of wish I knew why I thought to put that in here. My mom likes that movie. There's some weird things happening with that.  
  
  
  
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Hermione walked into the designated classroom a bit nervously. She had brought a lantern with her, and she placed it on one of the tables. Then she sat next to it a bit uncomfortably. Where was Malfoy? Was he really coming? She checked her watch. It was only five past ten; she could wait longer.  
  
She swung her legs back and forth and tapped her thumbs together. Hermione let her eyes wander around the room. She'd only been in this room once or twice before. It was basically empty, except for some tables and broken-looking chairs. She checked her watch again. Seven past ten now. Hermione drummed her fingers on the table. She started at a sudden sound behind her. God, I could really get in trouble for being out of bed, she thought.  
  
How is it fair that I'm here right now? She wondered. Why is it that even after all I did with Chuck and all I've done with Ron, I'm still totally clueless and getting help from my worst enemy? All right, just get over it, Hermione. No, I can't. So Ron and I haven't done much. Okay, that's okay. And Chuck? Things just went too fast with him, I guess. I really need to stop thinking about this. Okay, I need some sort of distraction. I'll sing, that sounds good. Ummmm…….  
  
"Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens, brown paper packages tied up with string, these are a few of my favorite things…" she sang idly.  
  
"…. Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles, wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings…" Arg, where the heck is Malfoy?  
  
"…Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes, silver white winters that melt into spring, these are a few of my favorite things…" She mumbled the rest of the song and then sighed. "Where are you, Malfoy?" she asked out loud.  
  
Hermione screamed suddenly as she felt a cold finger slide under her shirt and up her spine. She jumped in surprise and fell off the edge of the table, landing on the floor harshly.  
  
Draco stood over her, smirking. She scrambled up quickly.  
  
"Why did you do that?" she asked angrily.  
  
"I didn't mean to interrupt the song." He said. "What the hell was that, anyway?"  
  
"It's from, a, uh, movie." She stammered, still embarrassed that she'd acted like such a freak. Hermione narrowed her eyes at him a little. "I really don't think that was, uh, necessary."  
  
"So I'm guessing that Ron's never tried that one on you?" he asked, ignoring her. "It's elementary, really." Hermione didn't respond. "I've devoted my life to mapping all those sensitive spots on a girl." He continued. "I probably know about more of those than you do." He looked her up and down, smiling.  
  
"Let's just do this, Malfoy." She said, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Fine." He said. "What do you want to learn?"  
  
"I, uh, I." Hermione hadn't really prepared herself for this.  
  
"Did you have anything in mind?" he asked. Hermione shook her head and sat back down on the edge of the table. Malfoy leaned against the table across from her.  
  
"Not really." She admitted, looking down.  
  
"Okay, I guess we'll just start simple then." He said. "Kissing, maybe? Seeing as how you react to other things."  
  
"Malfoy, you surprised me, that's all." She said defensively.  
  
"Whatever, Granger. So I'm guessing that you and Weasley have, as much as it disgusts me to think of, kissed?"  
  
"Yeah, we've kissed, okay?" she said. "I'm not paying you to insult me here."  
  
"I wasn't trying to insult you." He said. "If that's what you want, I'd be happy to oblige."  
  
"No, I don't want you to insult me, Malfoy. God, you really irritate me, you know that?" She said.  
  
"I'm well aware, actually." Malfoy replied. "Look, I want my money. You want your lesson. Let's pretend that we don't hate each other long enough for us both to get what we want, okay?"  
  
"Fine." Said Hermione.  
  
"Allright then. Let's begin. Now kissing is a very simple art." Said Malfoy, slowly stepping closer to her. "Now, I know you've kissed Weasley. But practice never hurts anyone." He put one hand on either side of her body and leaned in slowly. "Show me what you'd do if I were one of your little boyfriends."  
  
Hermione bit her lip a little but leaned her own face in, touching her lips to Malfoy's briefly. She pulled away and looked at him, waiting.  
  
"Not bad, if I was your mother." He smirked. "Pretend, if you must, that I'm Weasley. Pretend you really want me, or that we're on top of each other or something. Ho would you kiss me then?" he asked, enjoying the slightly horrified look on her face. Hermione sighed slightly, but she wanted to learn this. So she leaned her face in again and kissed him.  
  
For a moment she was afraid to advance any further, but slowly worked up her courage and kissed him a little more deeply. She could feel him responding to her, and she tentatively slid her tongue into his mouth. Hermione had kissed Ron like this several times, obviously, they had almost had sex, so they'd kissed like this, but somehow it felt completely different with Malfoy. She continued to kiss him, enjoying herself more every second.  
  
She removed her hands from the table and wrapped them around Malfoy's neck. She felt him do the same with his.  
  
"He really is a good kisser." She thought. "But I know he gets more practice than any normal sixteen year old guy."  
  
Hermione ran her hands along his neck and through his hair. "He should really use conditioner" She though vaguely. She felt Malfoy slide his hands under the back of her shirt, their tongues continuing to explore each other's mouths.  
  
"Mmmmm." Hermione thought. "Why did it never feel like this with Ron?" she wondered again. The thoughts were starting to disappear from her mind; something about kissing Malfoy was so mind-numbing. "Wait, what's going on? You hate him, Hermione. Don't forget that." She said to herself.  
  
"I can kiss him and hate him at the same time." Hermione assured herself.  
  
She moved up to the very edge of the table to get closer to Malfoy, who was still standing. She pressed her body as close to his as she could and started to slide one of her legs up the back of his. She felt Malfoy move his hands to the small of her back, and she felt him pull her in closer. Was it possible he was enjoying this as much as her? "Perhaps." She thought.  
  
Unfortunately, a need for air was overtaking anything else, so she reluctantly pulled her face away. She looked up at Malfoy, only to notice he seemed a bit breathless himself.  
  
"Well?" she asked, biting her lip again. He was quiet for a few moments .  
  
"Not too bad." He said finally. He let go of Hermione, causing her to flop onto the hard table. "But there's always room for improvement." She rolled her eyes.  
  
"Well?" she sat up. "You're the teacher. Teach me." He sat down next to her on the table.  
  
"Your basic form was pretty good. And I liked what you did with your legs." He said, running his finger along her bare inner thigh for a moment, enjoying as she shivered a bit. "But," he continued, snatching his finger back up. "Your hands could use a bit of work. Running them through my hair was nice, but don't keep them on my neck for too long. Try along the back, or along the sides, or underneath the shirt."  
  
"Okay." Hermione, smoothing down her hair. "Okay, so should we try it again?" she asked.  
  
"You know, Granger." He said, looking her up and down again. "You've basically got the kissing stuff down. Is there anything else, you know, more advanced, that you'd like to learn?" Hermione blinked a few times.  
  
"Uh." She said tentatively, blinking. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Well…. was there anything in particular you had in mind?" he asked, stepping closer and looking her directly in the eyes. She blinked furiously.  
  
"Um." Was all Hermione could managed. "Very smooth." She thought to  
  
herself.  
  
"Okay, Malfoy." She said, gathering up some courage. "How about… undressing a guy?" she asked. He smiled.  
  
"Sounds good." Malfoy said. He stepped closer to her once more. "Okay. So, we're kissing. You want my shirt off. What do you do?" Hermione took a deep breath.  
  
"Could you, maybe, kiss me first?" she asked. He smirked a little.  
  
"Sure." He leaned in and touched his lips to hers again. Hermione kissed him for a moment, then reached up and started to unbutton his shirt. Once all the buttons were undone he pulled his lips away.  
  
"Okay, now." He said. "Look up at me, and slowly slide my shirt off my shoulders."  
  
"Okay." Hermione did as Malfoy instructed, letting her fingers slide slowly over his bare skin.  
  
"Good. Very good." He whispered.  
  
"What next?" she asked quietly.  
  
"You could try, you know, kissing my chest and stomach a little." Malfoy said.  
  
"Okay." Hermione mumbled. She started placing little kisses along his collarbone, and then worked her way down to his chest. She stood up and put her hands on his shoulders and she moved her lips down his stomach.  
  
Malfoy's skin was surprisingly soft, and Hermione let her tongue slide along his well-defined six-pack. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed him placing a hand on the table to steady himself. "Very nice", she thought. "I think I know a little bit more than he expected." Hermione suppressed a smile.  
  
By this time, she'd reached his belt buckle. She briefly dipped her tongue into the waistband of his pants and ran it over his skin. She felt Draco shiver a bit.  
  
"And where exactly did you learn that?" he asked.  
  
"Cosmo." She replied, smiling.  
  
"And that would be?" he asked.  
  
"Muggle thing." She explained.  
  
"Okay, what next?" he asked.  
  
"Ummm." Said Hermione she reached up a bit tentatively to his belt buckle. This was the part that always seemed to get her. She undid his belt slowly and then pulled down the zipper.  
  
"Right now, I am taking off Draco Malfoy's pants." She thought in the back of her mind. "How weird is this?"  
  
"Is, uh, this, you know, okay?" she asked.  
  
"Great." He replied quietly.  
  
Hermione took a deep breath. She slid her hands up the back of his pants and started to tug them down by pulling on the back pockets. She kissed his stomach as she removed them, exposing his dark green boxers. Hermione continued kissing him, moving her mouth downward the tiniest bit. She continued to lower his pants until they were around his ankles.  
  
Suddenly, Hermione realized what she was kneeling right in front of and stood up quickly, almost knocking over a chair.  
  
"Ummmmm." She stammered. "S-Sorry." Hermione bit her lip and backed away from him.  
  
"About what?" he asked, appearing enjoying the way she seemed so flustered. "Aren't you going to continue?"  
  
"Grrrr." Thought Hermione. "Only Draco Malfoy could stand there half naked and still be sarcastic and witty."  
  
"That…" she said, trying to avoid looking downwards, "Is a, uh, it's well, um, it's just another lesson, okay?"  
  
"So you want to continue your little tutelage?" he asked, leaning against the table.  
  
"Yeah, I uh, I guess." Hermione said, blushing slightly.  
  
"You weren't too bad, Granger. For someone who obviously has no clue what they're doing." He bent down to pull up his pants.  
  
"If only you could know how wrong you are." She thought, a frown slightly creasing her face. "Of course, you never will." Hermione had strict plans never, ever, to tell anyone about Chuck. She sat back down on the table.  
  
"Draco? Can I ask you something?" she asked suddenly.  
  
"Sure." He replied, buttoning his shirt.  
  
"Why do you do it?" she asked.  
  
"Do what?" he asked absentmindedly.  
  
"What you do, you know. Sleep around with lots of girls you don't care about." Draco immediately looked up and glared at her.  
  
"Why, so I can give sex advice to naïve little girls like you, Granger."  
  
"It was just a question." She said defensively. "I was just wondering if you know what you do to them."  
  
"I know exactly what I do to them." He grinned. "That's why they keep coming back for more."  
  
"That's not what I meant." She said. "You could really hurt them, you know."  
  
"Hey." He shrugged. "In my experience, the pain goes away after a minute."  
  
"You jackass." She said. "I'm trying to be serious. Those girls could be really damaged by your games." He stepped closer to her once more.  
  
"I don't think you know what you're talking about, Granger." He said.  
  
"I know more than you'd think." She replied.  
  
"Whatever." He said.  
  
"Malfoy, I'm serious." She said.  
  
"I don't give a shit what you think about me." He said. "I don't give a shit about you either. I just want your money. I don't need a fucking psychiatrist." Hermione blinked at the harshness of his words.  
  
"Malfoy, I didn't mean to insult you or anything." She said. "I just don't think you understand how, you know, fragile girls are."  
  
"I don't care about that." He said.  
  
"Do you care about anything?" she asked.  
  
"I'm not talking about this with you." He said.  
  
"Fine." Hermione said, seeing she was fighting a losing battle. "Fine. I'm sorry I asked, really. I don't care what you do with your life." She shook her head.  
  
"Good. You shouldn't." he retorted. Hermione shook her head.  
  
"Here." She pulled a few coins out of her pocket and handed them to him. He grabbed them up and left the room with a mumbled, "See you next week."  
  
Hermione shook her head. There was just something so strange about Malfoy. She hated the way he never respected anyone's feelings, but it was such a crime when someone insulted his.  
  
"Just because he's a Malfoy doesn't mean he's exempt." She thought. "Well, whatever. I know better than to mess around with his complex mind." She hopped off the table and sighed. "I wonder what we'll do next week?"  
  
**************************  
  
Okay, so it's completely obvious I didn't know how to end this chapter. The next one should be out soon, I want to get it out of the way so I can write the next session (hee hee).  
  
Does anybody know the codes for bolding and italicizing stuff? If you do, please review and tell me!!!  
  
Thanks to everyone who reviewed…. The feedback is really great!  
  
**Caroline, Coffee, mimi, goldenstar555, Sakura1287, Slytherins R Sexy, Escritora, SugarShortys23, Hellbound, snakecharmer, Evil, Calypso in Love, Lena, Alanna Roseguard, Draco'sgurl, Megan, and EmiV** 


	4. Hermione's Bad Day

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own HP. Sigh. I also don't own Cosmopolitan. The stuff in this chapter came straight from the April issue (my mom started reading it and was like, what the heck is this magazine?). Gotta love it.  
  
**************************  
  
  
  
Sunday slipped past Hermione, and Monday dawned all too soon. She groaned while rolling out of bed.  
  
"Oh crap!" Hermione cried as she rolled a bit too far and fell off the mattress. "Ughhhhhhhh." She groaned. Hermione leaned her head back, crashing it into the nightstand. Her clock fell off the edge and slammed onto her head. "OWWWWWWWWWW!" she yelled. "That hurt." Hermione rubbed her head. "Oh shit!" she cried, glancing at the clock. "Class starts in twelve minutes!"  
  
Hermione scrambled up and pulled off her pajamas while pulling on some acceptable clothes at the same time. "Great. The one day I oversleep is the day I look terrible." She bushed her teeth and shoved random parchment and books and quills into her bag. "Crap crap crap!" Hermione said, pulling on her robes and fastening them quickly.  
  
She raced out the door, checking her watch. "Great, six minutes." Hermione tore down the hallways, twisting up her hair and sticking a quill in it as she went. The shorter wisps fell out and into her eyes. "This is just GREAT." She thought. "Snape will kill me if I'm late."  
  
Hermione turned the corner without watching where she was going. In her haste she ran directly into someone walking in the opposite direction.  
  
"Oh my God Professor McGonagall I am SO sorry." Hermione quickly gathered up the spilled contents of her bag. "I-I'm late to potions and I just wasn't watching where I was going, really, I'm so sorry."  
  
"It's alright, Miss Granger. Just please watch out in the future, if you could." She continued on her way.  
  
"Great." Thought Hermione. "That was real good." But she really didn't have time to yell at herself; the three minutes she had to get down to the dungeons was currently a bit more pressing.  
  
Hermione sighed and continued her speed-run down the hall. She descended the steps as quick as possible and burst into the classroom door seconds after her watch beeped for eight.  
  
Suddenly Hermione stepped on the hem of her robes and gave a cry as she toppled to the floor. Snape's voice immediately filled the room.  
  
"MISS GRANGER! I WILL NOT TOLERATE SUCH A DISRUPTION TO MY CLASS! I WOULD EXPECT MORE FROM A STUDENT LIKE YOU! TWENTY-FIVE POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR FOR SUCH AN INTERRUPTION."  
  
Hermione sat up, wincing. "For God's sake, the class didn't even start yet." She muttered.  
  
"I heard that." Snape sneered. "See me after class to schedule a detention." Hermione sighed and stood up, limping over to her seat next to Harry. From across the room she heard Malfoy sneer,  
  
"Very nice, Granger. Graceful." All his Slytherin friends laughed. Snape began to talk, and Hermione let her head fall forwards onto the table. This day totally sucked, and she'd only been up for sixteen minutes.  
  
  
  
~~~The Great Hall- Dinner~~~  
  
Hermione slammed her books onto the table and dropped into her seat. Her robes were disheveled and her frizzy hair was falling out and sticking up.  
  
"Bad day?" asked Harry.  
  
"Ugh." Was all Hermione could manage. "Where's Ron?" she asked.  
  
"Over there." Harry said, pointing to where Ron sat with Dean and Seamus.  
  
"Still?" asked Hermione, her mouth full of apple. "He dumped me two weeks ago. He should just get over it and take the uncomfortable awkwardness like a man!" She ran a hand through her unkempt bun. "I mean, shouldn't I be the one who's avoiding him? He hurt me, ya know?" she shoved some more food in her mouth. "I mean, what is his problem?" she asked through her mouthful of bread.  
  
"He got hurt too." Harry said. "He really liked you, you know."  
  
"Yeah I know." Said Hermione. "Look at him. Trying to act like his life is  
  
normal. Over there with his little friends. It disgusts me."  
  
"Hey, chill out." Harry said. "Yeah, maybe he could deal with it better. But this is just what he does, I guess."  
  
"Well this is what I do." Growled Hermione. "So either make fun of him or get lost." Harry rolled his eyes. They both turned to look at Ron, who was indeed joking.  
  
"You okay today, Hermione?" he asked. "You seem a bit, well, different."  
  
"I'm fine." She said quickly. "Just uh, tired and stressed and sick of dealing with thiswholeRonthingyouknow?" she shoved some more food into her mouth to shut herself up.  
  
"Um, maybe you should start getting more sleep or something. You look kinda wired." Harry said. They both turned to look at Ron again.  
  
As Harry and Hermione watched, a tall, large chested girl with perfectly straight honey colored hair sauntered over to where Ron was sitting.  
  
"Who's that?" scoffed Hermione.  
  
"Um I don't know." Harry said quickly. "Hey you know, I have to go to the library to look for a uh, um, you know, one of those, uh you know, books. You wanna come with me and help me find it? C'mon." Harry pulled on her arm. "Come on. Yeah, let's go to the library. C'mon, let's go."  
  
"Harry! Stop pulling on me. Who's that girl?" she asked again.  
  
"Um I don't know." Harry said. "C'mon, library, now."  
  
"Harry." Hermione pulled her arm out of his grasp.  
  
"Hey! Look at that pork!" cried Harry, shoving some into her mouth. But the pork soon fell out of Hermione's open mouth as the girl leaned over and started to French Ron.  
  
"I'm sorry, Hermione." Harry said quietly. Hermione blinked a few times.  
  
"What the hell?" she asked. "What-who is that girl?" she demanded. Harry sighed.  
  
"Her name's Sara." He said reluctantly. "Ron went out with her last night."  
  
"I'm guessing they had a pretty good time." Hermione said sarcastically. They watched as Sara stood up and left with a little wave to Ron. "So they go out and suddenly she's Frenching him in front of the entire school? What's going on here?" she asked. "Was he going to tell me?"  
  
Ron looked over and noticed Hermione watching him. A guilty look came over his face and he stood up and headed over to where she was sitting.  
  
"I'm sorry, I have to go." Hermione stood up and grabbed her bag off the table.  
  
"You should talk to him." Harry said to her.  
  
"I don't want to talk." Her anger had faded and now Hermione could feel tears forming in her eyes. "He broke up with me because I wouldn't sleep with him, after he told me he was falling in love with me, and now two weeks later he's found some new girl and they're making out in front of the rest of the school. I need to go. Really, I just need to go and think. I'll be okay, but I can't be here."  
  
"Okay." Harry said. "But… you should talk to him. Really." By this time Ron had reached their table.  
  
"Hermione, I-" he began.  
  
"See you later." She said, quickly hurrying away.  
  
"Hermione, please, wait! Let me explain." Ron said. Hermione turned around to face him.  
  
"I'm waiting." She said. Ron took a deep breath.  
  
"I know what that looked like." He began. "And I'm sorry about her. I should've told you I was seeing someone new."  
  
"Yeah, you should've." Said Hermione.  
  
"I'm sorry, really." Said Ron. "I don't meant to hurt you. It's just, we both need to move on, don't we?" he asked.  
  
"You're moving on after two weeks? When we almost-"  
  
"It had to happen sometime." Ron said.  
  
"Fine." Said Hermione.  
  
Suddenly, she didn't want to confront Ron. She didn't want to scream at him for making out with a girl so soon after his lips last touched hers, she didn't want to make him feel bad for not sharing his plans with her, she didn't want to ask if he had even meant it when he said he was falling in love with her.  
  
She just wanted to cry. Or hit a pillow. Or throw darts at his picture. Or something.  
  
"Fine, Ron. But I have to go now so good-bye." Hermione spun around, hoping that Ron and Harry hadn't seen the tear falling from her eye.  
  
  
  
~~~Hermione's Room~~~  
  
"UGH!" she cried, throwing her bag onto her bed. It slammed into her nightstand and knocked off all her magazines and stray pieces of parchment. Hermione sighed and collapsed onto her bed, letting her tears fall. Hadn't Ron loved her, sort of? Hadn't she loved Ron?  
  
  
  
"I would've had sex with him that night. If it hadn't been for my stupid past, it would have been so perfect." She thought. Hermione rolled over and let her tears fall onto her pillow.  
  
"I'm never going to get him back competing against that girl." She thought. Could the lessons with Malfoy even help? Right now, she was hurt, yes. But on some level she understood that Ron was moving on. He wasn't being very brave about it, but yes. His life was going forward. Her hopes of winning Ron back were basically dead now. That girl had been beautiful, with straight hair and perfect curves. From that one glimpse Hermione knew this girl was probably an expert in the bedroom, too.  
  
But that was what her lessons were for, weren't they? Sure, she was embarrassing herself with Malfoy, and she still wasn't sure where she got the courage to undress him two nights ago, but it had to pay off eventually, right?  
  
She sat up with a sigh and began to pick up what had fallen off her nightstand. After she had it all piled up she noticed her Cosmopolitan on the floor. Hermione rolled over and snatched it up. She skimmed her eyes over the cover stories.  
  
"How to tell if he's good in bed." She said aloud. Well, it would be a nice distraction. She opened the magazine and began reading.  
  
"He notices if you're cold." She read. "Also if he pays attention to the little things. If he's an experienced traveler, has good vocabulary, good social status, is a good dancer, has the drive to win, and likes to cook." "Does any of that apply to Ron?" Hermione wondered.  
  
She pulled out a piece of parchment.  
  
RON:  
  
Notices things: sort of  
  
Travels: Went to Egypt, Romania????  
  
Vocab: Not really  
  
Social Status: Umm, we're all not exactly popular  
  
Dancer: Let's NOT go there (winter formal, ugh)  
  
Drive to win: Totally  
  
Cook: Not if his life depended on it  
  
Hermoine had to admit, it wasn't too impressive. But did all these things really matter? Ron and her were best friends. He knew her, she knew him. Wasn't that what was important? She sighed. Suddenly, an idea popped into Hermione's head.  
  
MALFOY:  
  
Notices things: He was sure to point it out when I fell over in Potions  
  
Travels: Extensively, so I hear  
  
Vocab: Over heard him use the phrase, "cataclysmic acquiescence" to describe his acceptance to go with Pansy to the winter formal  
  
Social Status: Umm, popular, I guess  
  
Dancer: Pansy seemed to have no objections  
  
Drive to win: Obviously  
  
Cook: ????  
  
"Woah, scary." She thought. Malfoy kinda racked up the points there. Whatever. "What matters is if you know the person well and you feel a connection to them, not some list in Cosmo." She assured herself.  
  
Hermione flipped through the magazine again, pausing on "75 Sexy Moves He'll Never, Ever Forget." She skimmed over the list.  
  
"God, I could never try any of these." Thought Hermione. "Where do the people get the bravery to do this stuff? Would guys even like this?" Truthfully, the only reason she made her mother go through all the trouble of owling the magazine to her was because it was great for a laugh.  
  
But maybe she could ask Malfoy about it. She could see if guys would like this stuff. These little tricks would certainly help her get Ron back, if they worked.  
  
"I'd leave that other girl behind in the dust." She said, smiling slyly.  
  
"Woah, wait." Thought Hermione. "What's with me right now? Why am I turning into a competitive psychobitch? Do I really want Ron back THIS much? Okay, maybe I do. I just need confidence to be with him. Confidence to forget about Chuck and move on. And I could get that with Malfoy. Yeah, so if I ever told Harry or Ron about this, they'd never believe I did it. I don't know where I find the nerve to go to those lessons. Maybe I've just changed more than I know. Maybe I'm a different person. I mean, having sex with someone certainly takes away a bit of your shyness around guys.  
  
Maybe I'm just in love. Doesn't love make you do crazy things? Maybe I'm angry. No, I'm not angry. I just need to try this. And if the lessons don't pay off, then I'll know I tried everything. But I can't move on until I put in my best effort. And learning from Malfoy would be the best effort I can make.  
  
So I'll try it. It's not like it can hurt me, really. My best effort, nothing more." Hermione smiled. Maybe this day wasn't quite as terrible as she's thought.  
  
  
  
**************************  
  
I know, I know. I suck at ending chapters. Don't hurt me *ducks under computer table*.  
  
But I hope this cleared up some stuff for those of you who wondered about Hermione suddenly being all ready to make out & stuff with Malfoy. Hey, she's just a fool in love.  
  
And I'm not making this NC-17 *hides again* cuz I got some reviews asking me not to, and to be honest I think I have too much of a plot planned for this to make it all graphic.  
  
BUT………. For my fellow smut lovers, I'm working on a new Dr/Hm fic that will have:  
  
A plot  
  
An NC-17 rating  
  
Some nice sex scenes for ya  
  
So I hope you'll check it out…. I'll tell you when I'm putting it up.  
  
Thanks to my lovely reviewers….  
  
***hermione-angel, Marilyn Stabs, mimi, Krista, goldenstar555, Sakura1287, AllyCat739, Sucker for Romance, ShadowGoddess, Alanna Roseguard, Mione G, HTML Queen, Wilwarindiel, Coffee, Hellbound, reybello2162, blackroseangel69, Shadow Angel, Seyna, Buffy Anne Summers, dracomalfoy'sbestbitch, and angelflare1234*** 


	5. Lesson 2

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine!!!! And when you see equal signs around a word such as =happy=, it's my sign for italics. I don't know how to do them, so just pretend.  
  
WARNING: This chapter contains a very OOC Hermione. But I had to write it, OK! My fingers just started typing, and I couldn't stop! Seriously!  
  
And happy 4-20! (Just kidding, I'm not really into that.)  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
Yes, today was going to be a good day. Although it may not seem as though a decision like this was possible to make overnight, it had happened. Hermione Granger had woken up determined to stop taking people's shit.  
  
Sure, she was still going to be the same person. Smart, nice, helpful. But now, just a little bit different. Hermione had been at Hogwarts for seven years, and she was =not= going to be remembered as that bookish dork who never did anything dangerous short of returning a book to the library a day late.  
  
It was time to finally just say what she'd wanted to say to people since the first day she'd walked into school.  
  
"Parvati, you are a slut." She practiced. Okay, maybe not that blunt.  
  
"I've been walked all over by everybody in this school." She thought. "I've had sex, and I would've done it again." Admittedly, the whole sex thing was a bad excuse for the source of her newfound confidence. But why deny it? She =wanted= to stop being looked upon as naïve and unproven.  
  
It was time to be something different.  
  
Hermione glanced in the mirror and closed her eyes a little bit. No, her hair didn't look any different when she squinted. Due to the humidity it had poufed up to twice its normal size.  
  
"Dammit, where's a freaking hairtie?" she looked across her dresser, irritated. Hermione finally located one and wrapped her hair into a messy bun.  
  
"Time to go." She said, glancing at her watch. Hermione grabbed a canvas bag off her bed and threw it over her shoulder.  
  
  
  
***Classroom***  
  
When Hermione walked into the room five minutes early she was a bit surprised to see Malfoy there already. But it was all the same to her. Hermione was eager to start the lesson to see if her little Cosmo tricks were worth memorizing.  
  
"What's in the bag, Granger?" he asked. She set it down on a table.  
  
"Just a few things." She said. "Can we get started?" He raised his eyebrows at her enthusiasm.  
  
"Sure, whatever." Malfoy said. "What's on the agenda for today?" Hermione took a deep breath and began talking.  
  
"I think I should explain to you why I really wanted to get these lessons." Malfoy nodded.  
  
"Go ahead."  
  
"Okay, well. You know about that night that I didn't want to sleep with Ron." Hermione began, a bit embarrassedly. "And I won't go into details about that. But you also know he broke up with me. And he's now dating this amazing, beautiful girl that I've got nothing on. And I need to build up my confidence so I can get him back." Malfoy suppressed a bit of a laugh.  
  
"Whatever you say, Granger." He said. "But really, what did you have in mind?" Hermione reached into her bag and pulled out her Cosmopolitan.  
  
"This." She said, handing it to him. He leafed briefly through it.  
  
"Interesting." Malfoy commented. "But why are you showing this to me?" Hermione reached over and opened to a page she'd turned the corner down on.  
  
"75 Sex Moves He'll Never, Ever Forget." Malfoy read aloud. Then he burst out laughing. "You want to try these on Weasley?" he asked incredulously.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Obviously. I mean, I asked Parvati and Lavender about this girl Ron's seeing, and they told me that she's definitely had way more, well, experience than me." She met Malfoy's skeptical stare. "It's your payment." She said, crossing her arms across her chest.  
  
"Fine." Malfoy said, shaking his head. Then he looked at her momentarily. "Hey, can I ask you something? Where exactly did this bold new Hermione come from?"  
  
"I don't know." She replied. "And really, it's not exactly a matter I'm willing to discuss with you."  
  
"Just a question." He said. Hermione contemplated the situation for a moment.  
  
"I guess I just don't want to lose him, you know? He's a great guy. You have no idea."  
  
"Yeah, and you doubt I ever will, right? Oh, the insanity of it all." He said mockingly. And to think I could've been friends with such a great guy."  
  
"Hey, no need to be rude." She said. "And anyway, it could do you well to have a friend. A =real= one, I mean." Hermione said, a pang of anger forming in her stomach. Who was he to insult her friends? "I mean, besides those two overgrown morons you hang around with."  
  
"You know, I would've thought a smart girl like you would've figured me out by now." Draco said, his eyes narrowing. "Do you think I'm an idiot? Of course I know that Crabbe and Goyle are fucking morons. But the leader has to have followers, right?" he asked.  
  
"I decided a long time ago not try and figure you out, Malfoy." She replied. His expression suddenly changed to one of interest. A small smirk formed on his face.  
  
"Oh, so you've spent some of your spare time thinking about me, have you?" he asked.  
  
"Well, yes, I suppose, because when you do hateful and cruel things to someone, they tend to stick out in the person's mind." Hermione said.  
  
"Does Ron know that you're learning how to pleasure him from a little magazine guidebook?" Draco asked suddenly. "Oh WAIT a second, he doesn't know that you've been "fraternizing with the enemy", so to speak, now does he? You blame him for dating some other girl, when you're spending your Saturday nights making out with the person who's made his life hell for six and a half years, Granger. Quite hypocritical, if you ask me." Hermione could only glare at him. "And what would little Weasley say if he were to find out about our secret rendezvous, hm? Bet he wouldn't be too happy."  
  
"Malfoy, if you tell him, you'll just be exposing yourself." She said icily. He shook his head mockingly.  
  
"Perhaps you haven't figured me out quite as much as I thought you had." He said. "In this school, I am a fucking God. If I were to say, perhaps, that you came onto me in a delirious haze brought on by losing your one true love, there's going to be about three people in the entire school who won't believe me. And I think you know who I'm talking about. Anything I tell these people, they'll believe. Me, or my father if necessary, could assure to that. So don't think you have your own little card to play by telling on me. Because it would just turn around and bite you in the ass, Granger." He said.  
  
  
  
Hermione had half (well, more, I suppose) a mind to turn around and never come back. But she figured that Malfoy might get angry at losing his payment and spill the secret. And, sensibly, where was she honestly going to find another guy to teach her this stuff? So she simply looked at him calmly and said,  
  
"Fine. We'll make a deal. We don't try to figure out each other's psyche. Ever. I don't ask about your clouded ideals and family history, and you don't ask about my past with guys or my relationship with Ron. Or anything. Just no questions in general. Okay?" she asked.  
  
"Deal." Malfoy said, extending his hand. Hermione took it. "So, back to the lesson."  
  
"Yes, back to the lesson." She said. "You. Sit. There." She pointed to a chair. He contemplated the order for a minute, then sat as directed. Hermione had earlier made a decision to finally take charge of this whole lesson thing, completely. That meant a little extra work for her, but what the hell? She could be daring. Her experiences with Ron and, needless to say, with Chuck and that whole crazy summer, would finally pay off. In those eight weeks they did a lot of stuff. Hermione had learned much more than she'd ever care to admit.  
  
"I'm going to blindfold you." She said, taking out a black scarf. Malfoy laughed. She glared at him, then proceeded to tie it around his eyes. "How many fingers am I holding up?" she asked.  
  
"Enough to give Ron pleasure, I'm sure." He said. Hermione rolled her eyes and continued his bondage to the chair. "Is there a reason I can't move my arms and legs?" he asked.  
  
"Yes." Hermione replied simply. "Now, you're going to tell me what feels good." She said. (A/N: I'm sure by now you're ready to throw up, but please bear with me here…)  
  
"Oh, I am?" he asked.  
  
"Yes." She replied again. She turned to page 172, then looked over the list and picked out a good, simple one to start with.  
  
"This is it, Hermione." She thought. "Just do it." She leaned over Malfoy, who was still wearing his patented smirk, and pressed her lips to his, softly. Instantly his semi-smile faded and his lips parted to give her tongue access.  
  
"Not just yet." She said, pulling back. "Just let me handle this, okay? I have a pretty good sense of what I'm doing." Hermione bit her lip; thankful he couldn't see the slight twinge of fear behind her eyes. She slowly lowered herself down until she was sitting on his legs. Then she resumed the slow, gentle kissing. He tried to build up speed, but that wasn't the way things were to work tonight. Every time Hermione increased the tempo a bit, she brought it back down as soon as she felt him start to slide out his tongue.  
  
  
  
Slowly, veeery slowly, Hermione began to work her way down to his neck, then back up to his jaw line, and up to just below his ear.  
  
"Good." He said into her hair.  
  
Now that she was more relaxed, it was time to start the tricks. She'd memorized a few to start off with. "Here goes." She thought.  
  
Hermione removed her mouth and reached her tongue out and flicked it along his ear once or twice, then kissed him a little more and did the same.  
  
"Pret-" Malfoy began.  
  
"Don't talk until I'm done." She said, not wanting him to break her concentration.  
  
Hermione moved her lips back down his jaw, stopping to drag her tongue every now and then. Once she was midway down, she slid her tongue out once more and ran it across his cheek at an achingly slow pace, then back down again. The concept of licking someone's face was kinda disgusting, but Hermione figured she'd at least try it.  
  
She resumed kissing him, but fiercer this time. The speed picked up, and she finally gave Malfoy's tongue access into her mouth. Hermione could literally feel their mouths generating heat together. She felt Malfoy pulling his arms instinctively; trying to touch her like a normal guy would when kissing a girl.  
  
But this was all her. It was a learning experience.  
  
She reached her hands up and ran them along his back, then up his neck. Their kisses became, if possible, more passionate, and she heard a small moan emanate from his throat. She sucked on his lower lip a bit, and then tried another of her tricks, pulling on his hair roughly, but still gently. Hermione was pleased with his responsive mmmmmmm.  
  
Then suddenly, Hermione moved her mouth back over to the other side of his neck she hadn't kissed before. After dealing with that for a while, she resumed kissing him, but returned back to soft and gentle. She felt his tongue trying to part her lips, but she just pulled back and leaned over to whisper in his ear,  
  
"No, no. Not right now, Malfoy," making sure her breath lingered on his skin. Then she returned to kissing him, touching her lips just barely to his.  
  
At this point Hermione pulled out her last move for that particular moment, from Clay, 28.  
  
She leaned in closer swiveled her hips against him; just barely making contact. It worked well because there was pressure against him one second, then the next, nothing. As she intensified the kiss one last time, she made the swirling more forceful, until she heard a louder groan from within his chest. Taking one last deep kiss, she pulled her head back and slid off of his legs.  
  
She breathed deep the welcome oxygen, and noticed him equally relishing his air.  
  
"Well?"  
  
"So you learned all that from a magazine?" he asked, the smirk returning.  
  
"No. But most of it." She said. "So? I mean, you seemed like you liked it pretty well."  
  
"Not too bad." He said. "Truly. I never would have expected that from you in a million years. But don't worry, I'm not even going to begin to guess where you learned it."  
  
"Chuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuckchuck." Her mind inwardly screamed.  
  
"Oh, I doubt you'd guess right anyway." She said. "So that was good? Ron would like it?"  
  
"Basically. He'd have to be a eunuch to not enjoy that." He said. It was probably the one time in her life Hermione had actually enjoyed his blatant comments. "And don't take that as a compliment, really. It's just my inner male speaking."  
  
"Okay. Good." Hermione said, ignoring him. "Do you have any suggestions?"  
  
"No, not really. You just seemed a bit tentative. It kinda kills the mood." He said.  
  
"Well, you're not exactly the greatest person to practice on. I mean, sure, you're good at kissing, from all your experience, but there is an element of, well, desire, I suppose, that's missing from us." She said. Malfoy's eyes took on a slightly mischievous glint.  
  
"Are you saying." He began, "That right now, when I've just been worked up by a pretty amazing kiss, and I'm tied to a chair without the ability to move any of my arms and legs, despite all this, you don't want me at all?"  
  
"Malfoy." She said. "Even if you were naked and begging me to 'pleasure you like only I know how', I still don't think I could feel any amount of desire whatsoever for you. You're too much of a jerk for me to want you in that way." She said.  
  
"Understandable." He said. "But you have to admit, there's always that 'I'm a decent guy, you're a decent-enough looking girl, let's get together to satisfy our hormones' stuff going on." He said.  
  
"You know Draco, you're right, actually." She said suddenly, taking on a fake innocent tone. Step One of the Getting Yourself Confident Program: Repay your enemies.  
  
"Now that you mention it, in fact, you do look pretty sexy all tied up like that. You know, I just might want to…" she reached down and gently sat on his lap. "…Take off all your clothes." She slowly began to unbutton his shirt." Hermione started up into his eyes as she slid the fabric back from his shoulders.  
  
"Oh really?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah." She said, and kissed him fiercely, then pulled back, keeping her face in close range to his. "And after I have your shirt off, that is, if you weren't tied up… I'd slooowly undo your pants and then slide them down, along with those satin boxers I know your father monograms your initials on."  
  
He snapped his head up. "And how did you know that?" he asked.  
  
"Girls talk." She replied, then leaned down and unfastened his belt.  
  
  
  
"Hey Draco, do you have any idea what we'd do =after= all your clothes were off?" she whispered, sliding down the zipper of his khakis.  
  
"I couldn't fathom a guess." He mumbled.  
  
"Well…" she said. "First, I'd let you take off all =my= clothes, as slowly as you wanted to." She played with the hem of her shirt a tiny bit, lifting it up to expose a few inches of skin. "And then, you could kiss me, =anywhere= you'd like." She watched as Draco blinked once or twice.  
  
"Tell me, Malfoy." She continued. "If, and this is, if you weren't tied up, would you take me if I asked you?" She enjoyed the surprise that blanched his face. "Right here, right now, on that table over there? Would you give me the special, "Malfoy Treatment" I hear girls whispering about all the time?" she paused to look into his eyes. "Well?" He looked at her, and whispered in a slightly raspy voice,  
  
"I think I could work something out."  
  
"Well good." She moved her face closer to his. "But don't worry", she whispered into his ear seductively, then pulled back and stepped off his lap, "Cause I'm never, ever going to ask."  
  
"W-What?" he asked. She shoved her magazine back into her bag and dropped some coins on the table.  
  
"See ya." She gave a cheery wave and turned to leave.  
  
"Could you maybe untie me?" he asked. Hermione turned around.  
  
  
  
"You're a wizard. Put your wand to good use." She glanced down slightly towards his lap. "For once in your life." That said, she quickly turned to depart, leaving the half-undressed Draco gaping after her.  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~  
  
  
  
There you have it: Hee hee! If you want to flame me, be warned: I know Kung Fu! (Not really, but it sounds threatening, huh?)  
  
Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou to all my great reviewers!  
  
Katie *n* Beth, krista, Lady Serena, Vampire Kid Kara, ice^queen886, Candy186, michee, ShadowGoddess, Shadow Angel, Alanna Roseguard, Coffee, Shadow Child, blackroseangel69, MsLessa, illgal_angel, Cassondra, Caroline, goldenstar555, mimi, and Sakura1287.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Okay, I just wanted to share this with all of you. This is an actual sex move someone sent in to Cosmo:  
  
"A religious ex used to turn on Christian TV and we'd listen to the preacher talk about sin while we got down and dirty." I literally laughed out loud when I read that. 


	6. More Plot sigh

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine  
  
A/N: This chapter sucks. No need to tell me. I'm bad at plot developments, so please don't bother pointing out how bad it was in your review. Cuz I know.  
  
  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
  
  
Days later, Hermione was still smiling. The look on his face, ah, it had just been an amazing photo op. Who knew what confidence could do to you?  
  
"I should've done this years ago." She thought.  
  
Classes were over for the day, and Hermione was changing into a blouse and some jeans to go meet Harry in the common room. She laughed out loud again as she brushed her hair. Ah, Ron would love the new her. Hopefully, anyway.  
  
Hermione glanced at herself in the mirror, and, satisfied, turned to leave. But a sudden idea sprung to her mind and made her turn back. She took a deep look at herself in the mirror, examining her white blouse, wrinkle free and buttoned all the way to the collar. Somehow, it wasn't exactly her anymore. Hermione tentatively undid the first button, then the next. Then, nervously, the next.  
  
"Why am I so scared? I can always just button it back up." She thought. But Hermione's shirt stayed unfastened, just the way it was. "So what?" she thought. It looked =good=. Her chest was more developed than she'd ever given herself credit for, and the way the lace of her bra was just visible when she bent over a little bit was suddenly a welcoming sight. Not a slutty look, but inviting, and almost cute. Sexy, even.  
  
Ron would like it. That was all that mattered, right?  
  
  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Um." Hermione leaned over the chessboard a tiny bit, letting a bit of hair fall into her eyes. Knowing that Seamus Finnigan was most likely staring down her shirt right now shouldn't make her feel happy. But Hermione was biting her lip to keep the smile from spreading across her face.  
  
Harry had explained he'd forgotten about the potions essay and had to pull an all-nighter to finish it. Hermione, of course, had finished it days ago. So, having nothing to do, she'd sat on a couch for a while, until Seamus challenged her to a game of chess. Now she bit her lip, contemplating her next move.  
  
"Oh! Queen to E4. Checkmate." Hermione said. "I won."  
  
"Huh, wha?" asked Seamus.  
  
"My queen killed your king. I won." Hermione repeated.  
  
"Oh. Yeah. Sure." He said. Hermione rolled her eyes. With her shirt buttoned, she never would have won that game. Amazing what a little bit of sex appeal could do to guys. It was crazy, really.  
  
"Well, thanks for the game. I gotta go." Hermione said, being sure to lean into him just a bit as she spoke. She had had no idea how fun it would be, acting like this.  
  
"Hey wait, stay for awhile. We could play again." He said. Hermione wanted to consent, but chess was just so =boring.=  
  
"No thanks." She lifted her arms up to stretch. "I need some beauty sleep." Seamus immediately focused his stare on the ceiling to avoid the nice view he could have been getting.  
  
"See ya later", she said, letting the smile finally spread across her face.  
  
Mission: Accomplished. For tonight, anyway.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
  
  
"Hee, hee, no, what are you doing, hee hee."  
  
"Um." Thought Hermione. There were some undeniably weird noises coming from that corner of the hallway. She had given up hope of finding something to do, and was just going to go to bed early. Now, it appeared some random people were making out, again. God, the hallway in front of her room was more frequented than any other in the whole school, even the one in front of the girls' showers.  
  
Hermione had her hand on the doorknob, but paused when the incessant giggling once again reached her ears.  
  
"Ron, stop. Hee hee. No, Ron, hee hee." As Hermione looked at the couple, a bright red head of hair came into view, the face of which was pressed onto the face of a girl in a miniskirt and tight black sweater.  
  
Ron and that girl, what's-her-name.  
  
A tight wrenching feeling suddenly formed in her stomach. Hermione knew that Ron had been seeing someone new, and that he seemed to like her, but suddenly having it shoved in her face hurt more than she expected. It was so real all of a sudden. For the past few weeks, she'd never seen them together. But suddenly, there they were. Right outside her room. The room Ron knew was hers. Suddenly, Hermione's hair was once again too big, her clothes too plain, her personality too dull. Something about this girl was just draining away all the confidence she had. Hermione reached up and rebuttoned her shirt. It wasn't exactly fitting anymore.  
  
She briefly contemplated interrupting them, but then decided to just go to sleep.  
  
  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Ugh, the way he sits there with that satisfied look on his face." Hermione stared across the Potions classroom at Ron. Since yesterday, she'd gotten over his little PDA with whateveryouwanttocallher. Hermione had simply realized it was going to take a bit more to win him back, that was all.  
  
Snape's faraway voice resonated in her mind, something about a project. Hermione yawned. She'd ended up lying awake for hours, thinking about Ron.  
  
"I will now assign you partners for this project, which is worth close to one third of your entire grade." Hermione's head snapped up. Assigned partners? Shit! "What if I get stuck with Ron?"  
  
She listened as Snape went agonizingly slow down the list of partners he'd written out.  
  
"Potter and Zabini." Hermione saw Harry sink low into his seat.  
  
"Granger and Parkinson." Hermione's heart temporarily leaped, but then crashed back down. Pansy? She had to do this project with =Pansy?=  
  
"Weasley and Malfoy."  
  
"Ha!" Hermione thought. "Ron has to work with Malfoy! Ron has to work with Malfoy."  
  
"Please sit next to your partners and begin research." Snape said after explaining what the project was to be about. Hermione begrudgingly got up and sat net to Pansy.  
  
As much as it pained Hermione to say, Pansy was no longer that bad looking. Despite her over-padded bra and piles of eye makeup, she was the basic picture of pretty.  
  
"Ohmygod so Milicent, yeah, I'm sooo totally asking Draco out, again. I mean, we are just totally and completely meant to be together." Hermione tuned the girl out and started in on some research.  
  
"Blehg." She said; Pansy had flipped her ocean of shiny hair (magicked to be perfectly straight, of course) right into Hermione's mouth. She choked and brushed it away from her.  
  
Hermione glanced across the room at Ron. Him and Malfoy were busying themselves with staring at each other. They both turned to look at her, and she quickly averted her eyes to find Seamus staring at her, trying to see if her robes were open and revealing another semi-buttoned blouse. She rolled her eyes. There was definitely a dangerous side to being pretty.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Hermione!" came a voice. Potions had finally been dismissed after an eternity of listening to Pansy talk about what guys she was hopelessly in love with.  
  
"Yeah." She turned around. "Oh, hi Seamus."  
  
"I'm sorry." He blurted out, breathless from running down the hall.  
  
"For what?" she asked.  
  
"For staring at your boobs all last night and today. I didn't mean to, it's just, I don't know. I can't explain." Something about Seamus' forwardness just made her want to hug him.  
  
"That's okay. I knew what I was doing with that shirt." She said.  
  
"There's something about you, I don't know. You've changed, that's all I can say." Seamus shook his head. "We've noticed, just these past few days."  
  
"We? Who's we?" she asked.  
  
"Me, Harry, Dean, Ron, even Neville."  
  
"So, what, do you guys just sit up in your dormitory and have a panel discussion about my boobs?" she asked, a bit alarmed. Who else had noticed? She hadn't even changed that much.  
  
"How did you guess?" Seamus asked. "No, really. Last night was the first time I've seen you dress revealing in almost seven years of knowing you. Basically, we've just noticed your change in personality. Really, what happened?"  
  
"Um." Hermione said. She was quite at a loss for words; "I slept with some guy I barely knew last summer and now Malfoy's giving me sex lessons" didn't seem appropriate.  
  
"Oh, nothing, really."  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
  
  
Believe me, I am hiding under the computer table right now. Um, this one wins for badness. But OH WELL, the next one should make up for it, I hope.  
  
Oh, and I've got my idea for my new smutty fic, hopefully to be out this weekend, yay.  
  
27 reviews, I almost beat my record. (Which was 27. Arg.)  
  
**Dasani Black, the person who didn't bother to leave a name (even though they just said "um…okay" and didn't even offer constructive criticism), blackroseangel69, Cassondra, Sucker for Romance, Sakura1287, mimi, goldenstar555, Key, Princess of Mordor, Kersten, weetziefairie, star123, lolo, Bad Gurl, Alanna Roseguard, Draco'sgurl, Muffy (I didn't realize my grammar was so bad, that's what I get for failing english… could you maybe point out something that was wrong???), RoseannRiddle, Athena's Quill, Skygirl5822, Shadow Goddess, & BabyPopstar** 


	7. Lesson 3, and Some QuasiFluff Developmen...

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine  
  
A/N: Sorry I haven't gotten my other fic out yet, I had this totally bitchy paper to write, but now that it's over I'm more on less back on track.  
  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
  
  
"OW!" yelled Hermione as she was shoved against the wall of their designated classroom. "What is your problem Malfoy?" Draco's angry face was close to hers and his hands had her arms pinned above her head.  
  
"Um, could you let me go, maybe?" she asked.  
  
"Let's get one thing straight, Granger." He seethed. "You pull any more shit like last week, and you can kiss you little lessons good-bye. If you ever try anything like that again, you are dead, do you hear me?"  
  
"Why Malfoy, I thought you'd appreciate my little demonstration of what I've learned." She said.  
  
"No, I didn't, actually. Because in case you haven't noticed, I could care less about you, remember? For the fiftieth fucking time, I want my money. Weather or not the Magic Slut Act I'm teaching you works on Ron is no concern of mine."  
  
"God, Malfoy, give it a rest. I know you're a heartless, self- obsessed jerk. You don't have to keep putting yourself down all the time. It's really not necessary." She looked at him, fake concern on her face. "Really." He pressed her body harder against the wall. His grip almost cut off the circulation to her hands, and she struggled a bit to free them.  
  
  
  
"I guess I couldn't expect to get a real argument out of such and inexperienced little brat like you." He said, boring his icy eyes into hers.  
  
"Fine, if you insist. Let's argue." Hermione said. "But where shall we begin? Perhaps we'll go back and forth insulting each other's friends for awhile, then exchange comments about your unloving, coldhearted parents and mine, who are, of course, muggle dentists, then we'll talk about how I'm constantly studying and have no life, then about how you make games out of ruining people's lives and devirginizing unsuspecting girls? Hmm? Sound good to you?" She raised her eyebrow while fixing him with a challenging stare. He moved his face in closer.  
  
"Bitch." He sneered into her face.  
  
"Asshole." She replied. They remained like that for the briefest moment glaring and contemplating, but both knew the inevitable was coming.  
  
And the kiss was amazing. Fiery, fueled by the hatred only two complete, sworn enemies can feel for each other. When Hermione pulled back, Draco was laughing once again.  
  
"Anger's pretty fucking sexy, huh?" he asked.  
  
"Excuse me?" she asked.  
  
"And my mood setting skills, really, I'm quite the genius." He said.  
  
"What?" she demanded.  
  
"Come on, Granger. Did you think I could stay mad at you?" he asked innocently. "Timing, mood. Both equally important and equally difficult to teach. I managed to combine them both into one lesson."  
  
"What? You were pretending to be mad at me?" she said, still struggling against the grip he had on her.  
  
"Come on." He said. "Your hands pinned above your head, hate and indignation burning inside of you, you didn't think that was sexy at all?"  
  
"Maybe, with someone else. Not with you." She said, a bit mad and embarrassed at the same time.  
  
"But you don't hate anyone else like you hate me." He said. "It doesn't work unless you truly loathe them."  
  
Obviously, Hermione would never admit exactly how nice that had been. Not romantic in the slightest, but there was just something about it. That feeling of enjoying something you normally wouldn't. Like a day of thunderstorms and dark skies in the middle of the bright, cheerful summer.  
  
"Whatever. Besides, everyone knows stuff like that. It really wasn't necessary." She said. He let go of her arms, rolling his eyes.  
  
"So." Draco said. "What're we doing today?"  
  
"I don't know." Hermione shrugged.  
  
"Once again, you've planned nothing." He said. Sitting down.  
  
"All right, Malfoy. She sat across from him. "I read there are four levels to the male orgasm. What do you say to this?" Hermione fixed him with an inquisitive look while resting her chin on her hand.  
  
"Excuse me?" he said, her forwardness surprising him.  
  
"The male orgasm. Cosmo pointed out that usually both people are so fixated on the woman's orgasm. No one ever really thinks about the male getting off. Any comments?"  
  
He leaned across the table. "What are you asking here?"  
  
"I'm asking." She said. "What would a guy like to feel or hear in order to have a really great sexual experience? What can make the orgasm really fantastic and just stick in his mind forever?" Draco got a strange look on his face for a moment.  
  
"I don't know." He said finally.  
  
Hermione could not believe she was sitting in a classroom having a relaxed conversation with Malfoy about orgasms, as if it were an everyday thing.  
  
"You don't know?" she said. "I thought you were supposed to be some sort of sex god."  
  
"Well, I am." He replied. "But I couldn't tell you, honestly. Every girl is so different. I'm always so caught up in the pleasure; I don't really even pay much attention to what she's doing. But that's a good thing, really. If the girl can make you forget where you are, I guess it must mean she's pretty good at what she's doing."  
  
Hermione thought for a moment. "Malfoy, that's almost kind of sad, seriously. I mean, not to get into your personal life, but all you do when having sex is focus on yourself? Do you ever think how the girl feels?" she asked.  
  
"No, not really." He replied. She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. They always get off, so what's the big deal?"  
  
"How can you be so sure?" she asked. "Did you ever ask them?"  
  
"Granger, you listen outside my bedroom door Friday nights, and you'll have no doubt in your mind." He said.  
  
"Have you ever seen 'When Harry Met Sally'?" she asked.  
  
"No. I don't even know what the hell that is." Hemione laughed.  
  
"Never mind. But they could just be faking, you know." She said. Malfoy immediately glared at her.  
  
"Oh, I'm sure Granger. You ask any girl. They'll tell you. Seriously, don't even try to get me doubting my sexual prowess. It's almost funny, someone actually thinking I don't always get a girl off."  
  
"Why is that funny, Malfoy?" she asked.  
  
"I couldn't expect you to understand, Granger." He said.  
  
"Try me." She replied. Malfoy sighed.  
  
"Have you ever had an orgasm?" he asked.  
  
"What?" she asked. This definitely won the award for Weirdest Half Hour of Her Life.  
  
"To understand what I'm getting at, you have to know what it feels like, and how hard it is to concentrate during such an intense sensation."  
  
Well, obviously she had, with Chuck. But Hermione would never tell him that.  
  
"No." she said.  
  
"Well, having had many myself, I'll tell you there's just something so real and true about it. You could make sounds and shit like that, but no matter how hard you try, if the guy has any experience, he'll know what you're doing."  
  
"So if I'm having sex with a guy and nothing's happening, I should just climb off him and say, "Sorry, but I cannot foresee an orgasm in the next fifteen minutes. Rather that hurt you by pretending, I'm just gonna go?" she said.  
  
"Now that is probably the one thing you should never, ever do." He said.  
  
"But I thought you just told me that the guy would know I wasn't really getting off." She said. "You are such a walking contradiction."  
  
"Well, having never been another guy, I wouldn't really know, I guess. After all I've done, I know the real thing. But I don't think most eighteen-year-old guys would. After awhile, you really start to get this good intuition. You can just tell it's real, from the look in their eyes or the sounds. But it takes some time." He said. "In the beginning, I probably wouldn't have known the difference."  
  
"But before you said that every girl was different. Maybe some of them know what they're doing more than you might think." She said. Malfoy just narrowed his eyes at her.  
  
"Whatever. It's not necessary for me to doubt my skills. Besides, if a girl left my room without having a genuine orgasm, her best friend would know about it in two seconds flat. Five minutes later, it'd be around school. Trust me, as hard as it is to believe, there are people out there who would love to bring me down. So, if you've never heard anything, it's safe to say there's nothing to be heard."  
  
Hermione had to admit he was right; no girl could ever keep something like that a secret. Malfoy stretched his arms out.  
  
"And, you know, thanks for the advice, I suppose, but who's teaching whom here?" he said. "You wanna get back on track?" Hermione shook her head. "I'm sure, deep down, he's actually really insecure." She thought. Riiiiight.  
  
"Okay Malfoy. We'll get back on track. You tell me what the greatest sex ever would be for you." She said. "If you got a girl who'd do anything to you, what would it be?"  
  
"Oh, so is this supposed to be my fantasy?" he asked.  
  
"Something like that, I suppose." She said.  
  
"I'll only tell you if you tell me." He said, locking eyes with her. Hermione contemplated.  
  
"Deal." She said. Malfoy sighed, and then closed his eyes.  
  
"No specifics come to mind, really. A girl I didn't know, who was gorgeous and sexy. And who wanted me so badly it made her hurt, and I'd want her the exact same way. And my dark bedroom, with the black silk sheets. No lights anywhere, no candles or shit like that. If it was night, I'd open the curtains and let the moonlight spill in. Lots of kissing and touching, then perfect, hot, rough sex. Lots of screaming and moaning. And ice. Lots of ice." He said. "Mostly, it would be nice to just have a desire equal to my partners." He said.  
  
Very briefly, his eyes clouded over, but like all mist it rolled away within a few seconds.  
  
Hermione chose to ignore it for the time being, and simply raised an eyebrow. "That was, um, interesting." She said. "You have black silk sheets?"  
  
"Satin, actually. But did you like that? I wasn't sure you'd be able to handle it." Hermione bit her lip to keep from psychoanalyzing his blatant need for someone to love him how he wanted to be loved, or at least to screw someone he truly had a serious desire for. It was the first time she'd actually felt sorry for Malfoy. He had just expressed one of his greatest wants without even realizing it. Acceptance, equality with a lover.  
  
"Oh, I've heard worse." She said.  
  
"Really?" he said, interested.  
  
"Come on, Malfoy. I shared a room with Parvati and Lavender for six years. After awhile, I discovered that it was impossible to block them out."  
  
"I see. So, your turn." He said.  
  
"Oh." Hermione had forgotten about their deal. "Well, I guess it would just be a long-time boyfriend, that I knew loved me, and he'd cook me dinner or something, and then we'd go for a walk holding hands and just anticipating the night ahead, then go to his room and kiss softly until we were ready, and we'd just have sex gently, and when I woke up I knew he'd still be there."  
  
  
  
Malfoy looked at her. "Are you a virgin?" he asked. Hermione's stomach dropped. Before, lying had been acceptable. What was lying about an orgasm compared to this? This, her virginity?  
  
"Yes." She said, relief and remorse colliding simultaneously.  
  
"I figured." He said. "But that sounded nice for a first time, for a chick anyway. It's always more important to them."  
  
"How old were you?" she asked.  
  
"Fifteen." He said. She nodded.  
  
"Who was it?"  
  
"A girl I met over the summer. She was sixteen. She said I was a natural. I figured I'd better use what talents I'd been bestowed with." He said.  
  
Hermione couldn't help but think Draco had never experienced true romance in his life. And even worse yet, he seemed to have no problem with it. His brain was like a Rubix Cube. As soon as you think you've got one side, you turn it around and it's all mixed up.  
  
"Oh." She simply replied. Hermione shook her head.  
  
"Granger?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"If you had been having sex awhile, what would you have a guy do if he'd do anything to you?" he asked.  
  
"Unfair question." She stated.  
  
"Oh, come on." Malfoy said. Hermione glared.  
  
"I don't know enough to respond accurately." She said.  
  
"Fine." Malfoy said. "Just thought if I knew, I could help you figure out how to get it." He said.  
  
"Thanks for the thought."  
  
"Sure, whatever." He said.  
  
Hermione got a strange feeling inside. "Did I just thank Malfoy? Okay, just remember, you're doing this for Ron." She said to herself. "Because I love him and I want him." Well, it was time to snap back into action.  
  
"Anything you just think I should flat out know?" she asked. Draco thought about this.  
  
"Well, I already mentioned the ice thing. I think any guy would like that. The whole "human sundae" thing is way overrated, really, it's a total fucking mess, trust me. Be sure to look at him intently, it'll make him work for you. Being vocal is good, really vocal is even better. Tell him exactly how he makes you feel. When you think he's going to come, scream out his name like you want everyone in the world to hear it. Why don't you try it out?"  
  
Hermione was a bit taken aback. "Try what?"  
  
"Screaming my name." He said.  
  
"What, now?" he asked.  
  
"No, later when we're screwing each other in my bedroom." He said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "Or course, now. It has to be full of passion, not some puny little whimper."  
  
Hermione laughed. If Malfoy was expecting her to produce a "puny little whimper", she'd definitely give him a shock. They already kept a silencing charm on the room, so that was no obstacle.  
  
"I don't really think it would work." She said. "In order to scream like I was having an orgasm, I'd have to be having one. And don't get any ideas."  
  
"Damn, you read my mind." He said sarcastically.  
  
"Well?" asked Malfoy.  
  
"This ISN'T going to work." She said.  
  
"Give it a try." Malfoy said.  
  
Hermione smiled slightly. Fine, he wanted a scream, okay then. She closed her eyes and thought back to how Ron used to make her feel, back to the night with Chuck, conjuring up some thoughts of pleasure to give him a nice scream.  
  
Satisfied, she gripped the arms of her chair, leaned back, and screamed "MALFOY!!!!" with all her might. The sound was throaty and perfect. Yes, she had certainly been given the gift of screaming guys' names. Hermione peered a cautious eye at Malfoy. He was laughing.  
  
"What?" Hermione asked.  
  
"No, that was perfect, really, it was. It's just funny. If we were to have sex right now, you'd scream out 'Malfoy'. I know it's what you know me as, but I mean, it's just my last name." He said.  
  
"Well, if we were to have sex right now, you'd scream out 'Granger'." She said. "That is kinda funny, you're right." She laughed. "But the chances of us having sex are, as I said last week, nonexistent, so you don't have to worry about that."  
  
"Obviously." He said. "I don't like doing virgins, anyway." He said. "You have to be so gentle and caring. Oh, are you okay? Oh, am I hurting you? I just try to avoid it."  
  
Hermione shook her head. "That's insulting." Chuck hadn't been a virgin. He hadn't treated her like a chore that night. But of course, he had been doing her for personal gain.  
  
"Hey, you'd feel the same way, trust me. After you're first time, you're going to be amazed at how much better it is."  
  
"Well, obviously." She said. "But maybe if you knew how much it hurts, you wouldn't chastise them for having to go slow."  
  
"You would know this how?" he asked.  
  
"Shit." Thought Hermione, her stomach dropping a bit. "I've just heard." She said.  
  
"Oh." Draco shrugged. "Well, just for background, I'd go for missionary your first time. After, feel free to experiment with anything."  
  
"Right. Erm, thanks." She said. Something about this whole night was making Hermione's head spin. There had been so much to take in, all the facts, plus the brief appearance of Semi-Sensitive Draco.  
  
Malfoy and her were so completely different; they almost canceled out each other, like a negative and a positive.  
  
Or maybe, just maybe, they complemented each other perfectly.  
  
No.  
  
"I guess not." She thought.  
  
'Have I lost you?" asked Draco.  
  
"Huh?" she asked.  
  
"I think we've done enough for tonight." He said.  
  
"Yeah." Hermione said. She dazedly got up and handed him some coins. "See ya later."  
  
Hermione left the room, thinking so hard it felt like two seconds had passed when she reached her room. She thought all through washing up, then when she climbed into bed she though even more.  
  
One, she hated Malfoy. Two, he was a complete jackass. Three, he was probably the most sexually magnetic guy in school. Weather that was good or bad, she didn't know. Four, he was undeniably sexy. Five, he was so complex it would take forever to just to figure out how to decipher him, much less perform the actual action. Six, it appeared he was hiding a sensitive side so lost inside him he could only stumble upon it accidentally. Seven, he was her worst enemy. Eight, she shouldn't be thinking about him so much. Nine, she loved Ron. Ten, Ron suddenly seemed farther off then he'd ever been. Eleven, Hermione didn't know if she could ever get him back. Twelve, somehow, it didn't bring a sick, unbearable feeling to her stomach anymore. Thirteen, she suddenly didn't know what the hell she was doing with her life.  
  
Hermione fell asleep before a fourteen, but what she had was definitely enough to last awhile.  
  
If only she had known someone else was lying in their satin sheets at that very moment, thinking startlingly similar thoughts, perhaps it wouldn't have been quite so odd.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
HA! TAKE THAT!!! I think that ending was pretty f*ing good. Well, if it was uncharacteristically sappy, I'm listening to Vanessa Carlton, so take it out with her. I think you can figure out where this is going, but I've got stuff planned for the future, so bear with me, please. This won't be insanely long, but it could stretch a bit. Not too long, don't worry.  
  
All right, well, reviews are always welcome!  
  
Thanks sooo much to…  
  
goldenstar555, TFG, Desra, Anita Blake, lolo, blackroseangel69, Coffee, Becka, Draco's one and only, mimi, Willangel101, Alanna Roseguard, TheBlindAssassin, Sucker for Romance, neato, Glossy, Aquacutie18, Lady Serena, sAi, Calypso in Love, Melanie, Amanda, RoseannRiddle, and dReAmEr.  
  
  
  
Shayla: Yeah, I got the worst stuff from the first chapter, but thanks for coming back.  
  
Muffy: I proofread this time!!!! (Sorta, there's probably still tons of mistakes…) And I'm going to go read one of your fics, perhaps I already have by the time you read this.  
  
Sakura1287: I wanted to put this in last time but got too lazy, but I think you are just the nicest girl ever! Reading your reviews always makes me smile.  
  
Elisha: You & your friend remind me exactly of my friend and I, we're always like, "OH MY GOD DID YOU READ THAT CHAPTER?!?!?" Then we have discussions and stuff. Really, there should be support groups for ppl like me and her. 


	8. Lists & North Tower GoingsOn

A/N:  I have nothing to write!  I've been dead tired and stuck in a writing rut, but I felt so bad about not updating for over two weeks.  I know some authors go months, but still.  So here's something for you, it's chock-full of clichés, and I do point them all out.  I do think it ended up better than I expected, though. ~_^

~ 

Things I Know:

By Hermione L. Granger

Ron is the first true love of my life.

Ron is not, and never will be, the first person I will have sex with.

Ron could quite possibly not be the second person I will have sex with, either.

Draco Malfoy is a stupid git.

Draco Malfoy is an amazing kisser and uses unusually enticing cologne.

I hate Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy is the single most confusing person I have ever encountered in my seventeen years of life.

Ron has a new girlfriend who appears quite airheaded.

I have never met Ron's new girlfriend.

Ron is being quite the prick about 'still being friends.'

I haven't spoken more than two words to Ron in a very long time.

Something about Draco makes it seem like I could talk to him about anything, if we were even remotely close.

I went to bed thinking about Draco last night.

I dreamt about Ron all last night.

"Greeeaatt."  Thought Hermione.  That really helped.  

Okay, bottom line.  Ron is an important part of me.  I would love to get him back and am not done trying to accomplish this task.  Draco is interesting, to say the least, when he desperately needs money.  But he's to confusing to ever decipher.

"Augh!  I knew all that already!" Hermione exclaimed.  She rolled over on her bed, a lazy Friday rain pattering against the windows.  The day had slipped by; it was almost time to go back to sleep.  A fat moon reflected its light off of her walls.

"I'd just let the moonlight shine through onto my bed…"

"Dammit!"  Extracurricular thinking about Draco equaled bad.  So what if it was sweet that he liked moonlight?  He probably enjoyed it so he could check and make sure he was fucking the right girl. 

Hermione was in a period of inner turmoil.  She did the only thing she could think of.

"Ahem.  Hogwarts is a prestigious school hidden by magical charms and spells to disguise it from outsiders.  This enchanted fortress is impossible to see through unless you know what you're looking for, but the real secret to its success and unequaled history lie within its very walls and classrooms."

Hermione slammed Hogwarts: A History shut.  What was wrong with her that her favorite book couldn't quell her entanglement of thoughts?

"Oh, right.  They say you never can think clearly when you're in love." Hermione thought.  A knock on her door disrupted her thoughts.

"Come in."

"Hey Mione!"  Dear God.  It was Parvati.

"Heey." She said weakly.  What did the girl want today?  Parvati stepped in, fully dressed.  Quite the surprise.

"Oh, sorry to disturb you so late, but a letter of yours got owled to your old room by mistake."

"Oh, thanks."  Upon being made Head Girl, she'd received her own quarters and had finally moved out of the room she'd shared with Lavender and Parvati for six years.

"What are you all dressed up for?" Hermione asked, already knowing the answer.  "Or uh, I guess, "who are you all dressed up for" would be the better question."

"Oh, I'm just going to meet some guy." Parvati said.

"Who?" asked Hermione, taking the letter from Parvati.

"Malfoy." She said.  Hermione spit out the water she'd just taken a sip of.

"Malfoy?  As in Draco Malfoy?" she demanded.

"No, his grandfather." Parvati rolled her eyes.  "Yeah, as in Draco Malfoy."

"But why?  He's despised all Gryffindors since day one." Hermione cried, feeling a bit bad about what she'd said.  Who really knew if Draco hated all Gryffindors anymore?

"Um, cuz he's really sexy, in case you haven't noticed.  I've noticed him checking me out the past few days, and I thought I'd surprise him with a late-night visit."  Hermione felt a small pang of disappointment.  Why was it bothering her so much?

"But that doesn't mean you have to go sleep with him." Hermione said.

"Look, Mione, I'm gonna give you a big philosophical speech now, okay?"  Hermione's brow furrowed.

"Uh, okay."  Parvati sat on Hermione's bed and took a breath.

"I know what people say about me, how I'm a stupid slut and stuff.  But it's who I am, you know?  It took me a long time to figure out that it wasn't worth changing just to achieve someone else's idea of true happiness.  I've realized as of late that life is hardly ever fairy tale endings and happily-ever-afters.  You take what you can get, and as long as it makes you happy, why the hell not go for what you want?  Or even what you think you want?  Sometimes what you need more than anything isn't even what you want, you know?  It's confusing and impossible, and I don't have anything truly figured out for my future yet.  But in the meantime, I just have a good time.  Experience is the best way to learn.  Practice makes perfect, you know?  I get my heart broken, I have sex a lot, but I don't care about it anymore.  It's my own way of learning what I need to learn.  The feeling you get is like knowing something about yourself without knowing anything at all.  And it's good, Mione.  It's so good."

Hermione should have felt like she was living in a huge cliché soap opera.  On one level, that speech was as cheesy as a dairy farm.  But on another surpassing level, the thing hit home directly.  This whole "Parvati Epiphany" was been out of place in her crazy life right now.  But wasn't that exactly what Parvati had been saying?  Things don't make sense, but sometimes you just know it's supposed to fit?  Hermione shook her head.

"Mione, you okay?"  She blinked.

"Yeah, I'm fine.  Thanks, Parvati.  For the letter I mean.  And great speech, I mean it. It was real Hallmark card material, truly."

"Huh?"

"Nothing.  Have fun with Malfoy."

"Oh, I will.  And thanks for listening.  I've been planning that thing in my head for months now."

"Sure, anytime."  Hermione said quietly.   She was still sort of taking it all in.

Parvati had been gone for several minutes before Hermione remembered the parchment clutched in her hand.  She shook her head and unfolded it.

Dear Hermione:

Hey there!  How's Hogwarts been?  I've been dying to talk to you for months; there are SO many things I have just got to tell you.  You have to come down to Manhattan for a few weeks this summer so we can do some serious catching up!  In the meantime, there are just a few little tidbits I can't keep to myself.  First, we moved into this awesome new loft.  There's a balcony outside my bedroom window so we can watch the sun set without having to sneak into a park and get reprimanded by the police!  The next is, and I hope you don't mind, but I've been seeing Chuck for a while.  I know he's your ex, and please tell me outright if this is a problem and I'll stop seeing him.  It's just that, he was so sweet about the whole thing!  And pretty soon I think I might even have sex with him… AHHH!   But neither of us have ever done it before, so I won't feel too bad.  It's strange, he has this whole player rep, but underneath he's so soft and sweet!  I'm sorry, I'll stop rambling.  I feel bad that I'm seeing your ex, I really do.  Please write back soon to tell me if you're okay with this, and about when you're coming down to visit (because you absolutely have to!!)

Lots of Love,

Anna

Hermione put her head in her hands.  What was she going to do?  She couldn't tell Anna about her and Chuck after all this time.  But Anna could not stay with him under any circumstances.  

"Just one more huge problem."  First Ron, then Ron's girlfriend, then Malfoy, now this?  Plus, she still had a Potions project to do with Pansy and two months to decide what do to with her life when she graduated.   

Perfect.  

Hermione desperately needed to talk to somebody.  Somebody she could tell her entire Ron/Malfoy story to.  But who?  Not Harry, definitely not.  Anna?  No, Anna wouldn't understand, having never met neither Ron nor Malfoy.  Hermione was quite embarrassed to admit she only had two people she felt close enough to share her personal life with.  What was up with that?  Besides all of her burdening problems, there was also the small issue of convincing her innocent cousin what a jerk her boyfriend was without revealing her own past.

"Why didn't I just tell Anna about Chuck in the first place?" she groaned and fell backwards onto her bed.

"I hate being such a confused teenager!" Hermione cried.  What to do when problems without answers abounded?  

~

Ah, the good old North Tower.  Always there when you needed it.  Hermione looked out the window and gazed up at the sky.  Yes, the second extraordinarily cliché thing she'd done/heard in the past hour.  But sometimes it's the clichés you need the most.  

She was just noticing how a certain patch of stars resembled the freckles on Ron's nose exactly when the door burst open.  In the dark, it was impossible to say who it was.  

"Hello?" she said.  There was no response.  A glint of sudden moonlight exposed the person's face.  

"What are you doing here?" Hermione cried.

(Yes, you'd THINK it's Draco.  But come on, three clichés in under three pages?)

"What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here?  What are you doing here?"

"I have just as much of a right to be here as you do."  Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Um, this is stupid.  I came up here for some quiet reflection and to look at the view."

"Well, Granger, I came up here to look for Malfoy, okay?  Not stare at the stars like some lost, lonely castaway."

"Pansy, why on earth would Malfoy be here?" Hermione demanded of the other girl.

"I don't know." She sneered.  "He once mentioned that he liked looking at the moonlight, or something stupid like that.  Since there's obviously no moonlight in the dungeons, I though he might be up here, okay?"

"Fine." Hermione said.  There was a long pause, which Hermione used to suppress a small smile.  Moonlight, huh?  He must not have been kidding about his fantasy.

Hermione glanced around.  "I don't think he's up here, Pansy."

"Well, that much is obvious!" she cried, obviously lost in her frustrations.  She was almost bordering on civility towards Hermione.  "Almost" being the key word, of course.

Suddenly, Pansy did an extremely unorthodox thing.  She crumpled to the floor, crying like the first runner up of the Miss Universe Pageant.  

"I just don't know anymore!"  Pansy wailed.  "It's all so confusing!  I don't think Draco loves me anymore.  I mean, I just wanted us to finalize our itinerary for before, during, and after the Springtime Ball, and he claims that he never even asked me to go, which of course he did." Pansy's triple coated mascara slid down her face, with some tears mixed in, too.  

"Pansy must really be in distress if she didn't even remember to put the right charms on her makeup." Thought Hermione.  This was all taking her by EXTREME surprise, and she wasn't sure how to handle it, exactly.

"Um." Hermione cautiously bent down and placed a reassuring hand on the girl's long, dark hair.  "There there."

"But I mean, I've gotten a lot prettier in the past six years, and if Draco Malfoy can't see that I'm such a changed woman, he shouldn't deserve my time, right?  But he doesn't notice and I still love him.  And now he keeps talking about this girl he's been seeing, and how at first he really hated her for being so stuck up and all, but now he keeps saying that something about her just makes him want to get to know every aspect of her personality!  And that's stupid, too, because he can't know her THAT well because he says she goes to Beauxbatons!" Pansy wept into the embroidered handkerchief Hermione offered her.

"Well, at least you've got no other Hogwarts competition, then." Hermione said.

"I mean, he tells me all this personal stuff about him, too.  Like you'd think it was weird he told me all about this girl when he really seems to like her and he knows I like him too, right?" 

Pansy was speaking so quickly Hermione could just barely catch her words.

"But if you ask me, I think he's just making her up, right?  Yeah, that's what he's doing." She brushed her eyes with the hem of her shirt.

"How did he say they met?" Hermione asked quietly, not wishing to spur another dizzying speech from the babbling girl.

"I don't know!  Oh!  His father knew her parents and supposedly over spring break he tutored her in something or another.  But its' not fair!  I'd let him tutor me!"

Hermione finally put together fragments of Pansy's rapid chatter.  

"Hated her for being stuck up?  Wants to get to know her personality?  Tutors her in something or another?"  This time, the smile was impossible to hide.

So Malfoy wanted to get to know her personality, huh?  Okay, so right now, he was probably doing her ex-roommate.  But still.  Draco cared more about her mind than what color her underwear was.  

It was flattering, to say the least.  

Pansy had since stood up.

"You know what I'm gonna do?  I'm gonna march down there and tell him that he can have his little Beauxbatons whore if he wants over the summer, but for now he can have all the 100% grade-A woman meat he can handle, straight from the Pansy Parkinson Slaughterhouse.  I have no competition.  I am the prettiest, the most graceful, most dignified girl ever to walk the corridors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.  I'll go to any, and I mean absolutely any means to show him he doesn't have to settle for less as long as I'm around."

Hermione stifled her laughter as best as she could manage.

"Well uh, good luck with that.  I'm glad I could help you work out your problems." Hermione said.  Pansy looked down at her.

"Um, I don't think so.  The day Pansy Elizabeth Parkinson gets help from a lowly Muggle-raised Gryffindor is the day pigs fly."

"Would those be the same pigs you kill at you slaughterhouse?" Hemione asked.

"Huh?" said Pansy vacantly.  "Whatever, Granger.  You tell a soul I conversed more than necessary with you, and you're dead meat, you hear me?"

Ah, it would have been so easy.  But Hermione let the whole "meat" joke die.  At the hands of the butcher…

"Bye Pansy." She said, as the girl triumphantly marched off to claim her sexy beefcake.

(I'm done now, seriously.)

Hermione let a smile spread across her face as she curled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them.  It was always the same with girls.  No matter how bad they feel, something good, anything really, could alleviate the bad feelings.  Temporarily, anyway.

"So it may not even be true." She thought.  "And in Draco-speak, wanting to get to know me is basically his way of saying he doesn't find me physically attractive at all."

But that was okay.

Hermione took out the list she'd brought up with her and added one more thing she knew.

"Draco Malfoy is worth a shot."

Hermione put her quill down, unable to stop smiling.  Why in God's name was this making her so giddy?

Hermione leaned back and rested against the Tower wall.  After a while, she closed her eyes; something had made the moonlight shining in drastically, but certainly not unbearably, brighter.

~

Ahh, good times abound.

Thanks to everyone for helping me to be my review record!

*Jenie, Alanna Roseguard, IvoryClover0, Laurie, Anne, silver darkness, Femme Fatale, Coffee, Muffy, lolo, Sila-chan, christine, bumblebee, mimi, Sucker For Romance, Sakura1287, sAi, goldenstar555, fang, TheBlindAssassin, Glossy, Anita Blake, Calypso in Love, Maura, *beth*, MangaPixie, Silent Sirena, krista, jepa, LadyJenn, Key, & Archangela.*

All you guys are so awesome!  The feedback has been amazing.   


	9. Ingenuity & Oralities yes, that IS a wor...

Rating: R Disclaimer: Nothing's mine! A/N: Oh my god, this is long. Sorry. And who thinks that the guy who sings "Take On Me" can sing disturbingly high? Okay, now that you're thinking I'm a complete eighties music dork, please read the chapter so I'll shut up.  
  
~  
  
The next day dawned stormy and dark. Hermione woke up from her position propped against a wall of the North Tower.  
  
"Owwww." She said, stretching her back out. The night came back to her while she pulled her arms above her head.  
  
Hermione still had the weird encounter with Pansy fresh in her mind. She glanced down at the list in her lap and blushed upon re-reading the last addition.  
  
Had what she'd written just been one of those spur-of-the-moment thoughts? Was Draco worth her time and energy? Was she tired of asking herself this question over and over again?  
  
Yes. But it certainly held more intrigue than say. thinking about Ron.  
  
~  
  
"So I hear you slept with Parvati." Hermione said as she sat down across from Malfoy that night.  
  
"Yeah, and?"  
  
"Nothing." Hermione said, suddenly realizing there was no plausible reason why she should care. She was still wondering if Draco really wanted to get inside her mind, but those were musings better left for later.  
  
"She's pretty fucking awesome, you know. Maybe you should've taken lessons from her."  
  
"Right, that would've been a good idea. Five minutes and the whole school would know about it. Including Ron." Hermione winced.  
  
"Yeah, I must agree. That chick's got a pretty big mouth."  
  
"Well, I guess you would know, wouldn't you?" said Hermione.  
  
Draco smirked. "I guess I would." He stopped as if a sudden thought had entered his brain.  
  
"Hey, did you ever want to learn that?" he asked.  
  
"Learn what?" she asked.  
  
"You know, oral pleasure?"  
  
Hermione blushed just the tiniest bit. "I don't know. Do you think it's something I should be able to do?"  
  
"Probably. It's universally liked by every guy on the planet, and can always be used as a sort of backup plan."  
  
Hermione tucked her hair behind her ears. "Okay. I guess. I mean, I don't really know how I'm going to learn something like that without actually, um, I mean, uh, without a real."  
  
"Penis?"  
  
"That's the word." Hermione laughed nervously.  
  
"I think I can figure out a way to help you." Draco reached underneath the table and fumbled around for a moment.  
  
"We can use my wand." He said. "Its just the right size and shape, I think."  
  
"Your wand?" Hermione said a bit squeakily, closing her eyes. "Right, sure." She heard the sound of rustling fabric.  
  
"Here." Draco said. She opened her eyes slowly to see him holding out his wand.  
  
The thin, wooden one used for casting spells, of course.  
  
"Your wand, great, perfect." She said, embarrassed.  
  
"Why, what were you thinking of?" he asked.  
  
"Nothinginparticular." She said, snatching the wand from his hand. "Yep, just what I had in mind. This is just perfect. So, what do I do?"  
  
(A/N: Okay, that was dumb, I know. But I felt like doing it.)  
  
"Okay, first. A few ground rules for you, Miss Granger. Firstly, just know that anywhere you touch is going to feel good for this particular activity."  
  
"Great. Got it."  
  
"Okay, now some, etiquette, shall we say? The polite way to give oral sex is this, you have to be gentle but still. urgent, I suppose is the right word. Be sure you cover your teeth with your lips. Remember that teeth hurt like a bitch. Also, it takes some spit. Chew gum before or something, but your spit's just like lubricant. Sex of any kind always feels better with lubricant."  
  
"Uh.okay."  
  
"And. what else? Um, be sure you take advantage of all your assets. Use all parts, if you get what I'm saying, for maximum pleasure. Don't be afraid to use your hands. You may, in some situations, need them for balance of some sort, but it can really feel good to get them in on the action."  
  
"And. what kind of, well, motion am I supposed to use?" Hermione asked.  
  
"Well, honestly, up and down is really all you can do. Once you get really skilled, you can try going up with your mouth and down with your tongue at the same time."  
  
"Isn't that physically impossible?" she asked.  
  
"Not if you're a mystery girl in the locker room after Quidditch practice." Draco said, shaking a head filled with fond memories.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes.  
  
"Okay, forget that one. Um. what else is important? Oh, remember that if you've been concentrating on one area, starting in on another one will feel better than if you'd just been working everywhere, you get what I'm saying? When one place is ignored for awhile, it's a stronger sensation when it gets some attention."  
  
"I get it." Hermione nodded.  
  
"You wanna practice on my wand?" Draco asked.  
  
"I don't think that's necessary." She said.  
  
"Your loss." He stuck it back in his pocket.  
  
"Um, what am I supposed to do with, you know, well, what do I do after he's."  
  
"I say swallow." Draco said. "It's honestly kind of insulting, to me anyway, when girls don't. But you might not want to, or you might just get it in your mouth and be so disgusted that you can't stand to have it in your stomach. At any rate, I'm sure Ron wouldn't have a big problem with it either way."  
  
"If I don't want to, you know. swallow it? Where do I um, what am I supposed to do with it?"  
  
"I honestly don't know. Whatever girls do with it is some secret I have yet to find out. But, on another note, I have heard of charms you can do to make it taste like a certain way, like chocolate or something."  
  
"I guess I'll have to look into that." She said. "Anyway, moving on. How am I supposed to bring up the subject of, you know, going down on him? Will he tell me what he wants? Am I just supposed to know that it's the right thing to do?"  
  
"Well, since I somewhat know the personality of the subject in question, he doesn't seem like the type of guy who'd be comfortable asking you for that. So I guess on a night when you're feeling specifically bold, lean over and whisper something suggestive into his ear. He'll always be into it, no matter what time, place, day of the week. Whatever. And after you get good at it, it's something you can do if you guys have just gotten to the making out stage and he's already gotten his equipment ready, you get what I'm saying? It would actually be a courtesy for you to help him out there. It's kind of uncomfortable for guys to just be ready and waiting. I mean, pants aren't really designed to be hard-on accessible, you know?"  
  
"Not really." She said. It was only a small lie, really.  
  
"Well, believe you me, it is. Why don't you come over here?" he asked.  
  
"Okay." She moved to sit across from him.  
  
"Pretend that tonight you want to practice what you're just learned. What are you going to do?"  
  
She contemplated for a minute.  
  
"First, I'm going to kiss you." She leaned into him and touched his lips.  
  
"Then, after awhile, I'd whisper something sexy and suggestive."  
  
"Like?" he asked.  
  
"Maybe." she leaned into his ear. "Tonight I want to make you feel more amazing than you ever have before."  
  
"That's good, very good." He replied. He leaned closer to instinctively kiss her neck, and she whispered into his hair.  
  
"Then I'd start to take off your pants." She reached her hands down and began to undo his belt.  
  
"Then I'd unzip them." she reached for the zipper and pulled it down. "And th-"  
  
She paused as she felt Draco's hands brushing the inside of her thighs. When had they gotten there?  
  
"What are you doing?" she whispered.  
  
"What are you doing?" he whispered back.  
  
"I-I'm just."  
  
"Taking off my pants."  
  
"Yeah, that's it."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"Well, what are you doing?"  
  
"I'm just." he stopped talking and started slowly lifting up her skirt. Hermione looked at his eyes, but didn't try to stop what was happening.  
  
Wait, what was happening? Was this part of the lesson? Was she supposed to learn something from this? Something besides how. soft his hands were?  
  
Her skirt was pretty far up on her thighs, and she could only look at him, reflexively opening her legs just a bit as she leaned back in her chair. This was. indescribable. Not because it was so amazing, but because Hermione couldn't even begin to pinpoint how she was reacting.  
  
"I'm just trying to see what color underwear you have on." He mumbled, smirking up at her again. "Pink is good, very good."  
  
Her heart dropped just the tiniest bit.  
  
But Hermione leaned up and began kissing him anyway, feeling his hands where right where they had been before. She felt one of Draco's fingertips slide just the tiniest bit underneath the lace trimming of her panties.  
  
Hermione closed her eyes. Whatever was happening, she wanted it. She wanted it so badly. It was probably another one of Draco's twisted lessons, but for right now, nothing had ever felt better. He had said he just wanted to see her panties, but he'd seen them already. No one could want to look at her underwear for this long. She could feel heat beginning to burn inside of her, and Draco's skin felt warmer to her mouth.  
  
She felt his breath tingling her neck as his lips returned. Hermione parted her legs just a tiny bit more and tilted her head up, letting a small 'mmm' escape her as Draco's thumb continued its journey.  
  
"Hermione?"  
  
Oh, god.  
  
Hermione's head snapped to the left to stare at the person standing in the doorway.  
  
"No way. This is a mirage. Not real. Not real. NOT real. This cannot be happening."  
  
"Chuck?"  
  
"Hey babe, what's up?"  
  
She could only stare at him as she tumbled backwards off of Draco's lap.  
  
"Well, obviously you have no more unresolved feelings for me." He said, noticing Draco's unzipped pants.  
  
"Oh, um." Hermione was utterly, completely, and totally speechless.  
  
"Chuck, this." she didn't know how to finish the sentence. It was all too unbelievably cliché and shocking all at once.  
  
"This isn't what it looks like, Draco was just." Just what? Why did she feel the need to explain herself to him?  
  
"Feeling you up? And down?"  
  
Suddenly Hermione felt a wave of anger. No, he had no right to be here. Why was he even here? She deserved an explanation. More than an explanation, really. She stood up and smoothed down her skirt.  
  
"Aren't you going to make introductions?" he asked.  
  
"Chuck, this is Draco. A friend. And Draco, this is Chuck. Someone I used to know." She said icily.  
  
"Hey." Draco refastened his pants as best he could and shook Chuck's outstretched hand.  
  
"Chuck, what the hell are you doing here?" Hermione asked.  
  
"Well, I heard that Anna told you we were dating, and I felt bad about the whole thing, so I though I'd come by and see you."  
  
"At my school? At eleven at night?"  
  
"Yeah, time change. Kinda forgot. I do live in the United States, you know."  
  
"Oh, I know." She said sarcastically.  
  
"Yeah, well. I just figured I'd tell myself to apparate to wherever you were."  
  
"You can't apparate inside the school grounds." she mumbled upon reflex.  
  
"You know me, Mione. Have I ever been afraid to break the rules?"  
  
"Wait, I didn't know you were a wizard." She said.  
  
"I didn't know you were a witch. So we're even."  
  
"What if I had been in my bed? Or in the shower? Or in class? What if I had been anywhere public and you just showed up?"  
  
"Well, you weren't. And as for the shower thing, I don't think you have to be shy about that after last summer." Hermione looked back at Draco.  
  
"I think I'll just go." Draco said.  
  
"No, you don't have to go." She said to Draco. "I think, no I know Chuck needs to leave."  
  
"I just got here." He said.  
  
"I don't think we have any business ever talking again." She said, hoping her curt tone would get him to leave. "After last summer I don't ever want to talk to you again. Please just go. Please."  
  
"No, I need to talk, okay?"  
  
"We have nothing to talk about anymore." She said.  
  
"Come on." He reached for her arm. "We always used to have so much to talk about."  
  
"Well, those days ended. You made sure those days ended."  
  
"Please, Mione? I'm trying to do the right thing here."  
  
"It's a bit late for that."  
  
"It's never too late to turn around."  
  
"Look, I don't want to argue with you, I don't want to blame you, I don't want to confront you. I just want you to leave, okay?"  
  
"I'm really going to go now." Draco said.  
  
"No, Chuck's leaving. He really is." Hermione said firmly.  
  
"I'm not." Chuck said. "Can we go talk?"  
  
Hermine turned to Draco. "Can you wait here for just a minute?"  
  
"Fine." He sat down.  
  
"Thanks." She led Chuck into the hallway.  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"I want to talk about Anna."  
  
"What about her? Planning to pull the same scam? She wrote me and told me how you said you were a virgin."  
  
"I never said that."  
  
"She wouldn't lie, Chuck."  
  
"Look, I think she interpreted what I said to mean that I had never had sex before. But I told her that I wasn't a virgin just a few days ago. It was after she sent you the letter, and she's still fine with it."  
  
"That's a bunch of crap, Chuck."  
  
"It's true. Mione, I love Anna."  
  
"You loved me."  
  
He winced a bit. "This is for real. I mean, not that with you wasn't real, I mean, I know it wasn't real, but."  
  
"But what?"  
  
"Look. I'm sorry I did what I did to you. I was young and immature and stupid and I know you can never forgive me. But I love Anna more than anything in the world and I can't let her go. I know we need to tell her what we did and face the consequences, and I know that won't be easy. But I have to do whatever it takes to keep her, starting with making amends with you and getting your help."  
  
"I'd love to believe you, Chuck."  
  
"Please, please help me out here. I love her, honestly with all my heart. I've changed into someone so much better than the person I used to be."  
  
Hermione looked at him.  
  
"School gets out in a month and a half. I'm coming down to visit Anna soon after that. You promise me that you don't tell her one lie about how you feel for her, and most importantly that you won't sleep with her or do anything she's not ready for until then. When I come down I'm telling her everything from my own unbiased point of view. Don't tell her anything until then. If she forgives both you and I, especially you, then you can keep seeing her. Okay? And if I come to the conclusion that you honestly love her after all this, then you can go ahead and do whatever you two are ready for."  
  
Chuck nodded. "I can accept that. Thanks for agreeing to help."  
  
"I'm doing this for Anna. Not you." Chuck looked defeated.  
  
"Mione, I just hope that you still believe that you can always change you opinion of somebody, no matter what."  
  
"You honestly remember me saying that?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah, I do. You know, we did have a lot of good times together. And you did change what you thought of me, remember?"  
  
"Yeah. I remember."  
  
"That whole time we were together, the only lie I told you was. well, you know. I loved being with you. Just sitting and talking with you made me feel great. And when you would smile."  
  
"So what went so horribly wrong?" she asked stoically.  
  
"I was afraid. I'd never been in love with someone, and I figured that before I got myself into something too big to handle, I'd just get something I wanted and be done with it. I thought doing what I did would make me feel powerful, and make my friends appreciate me. I hadn't slept with as many girls as them, and I needed something to prove that I was just as enticing. He paused. "I was wrong, though."  
  
"It's okay, Chuck. Let's just forget it. Go back to Manhattan, and I'll see you in a few months. And don't forget the promise."  
  
"I won't."  
  
They went back into the classroom.  
  
"Oh, Draco, thanks for waiting." Hermione said.  
  
"Sure." He said noncommittally.  
  
"Chuck is really leaving now."  
  
"Yeah. Nice to meet you." Draco said.  
  
"Same here. And be good to Mione, she's an awesome girl. And, if you ask me, pretty amazing in bed." With a wave and a pop, Chuck was gone.  
  
Hermione froze.  
  
"What was that he said?" Draco asked.  
  
"Nothing?" Hermione said meekly, sitting down rigidly.  
  
"You told me you were a virgin." He said, smiling. "You lie, Granger."  
  
"Umm."  
  
"Maybe I should go and tell Ron your dirty little secret."  
  
"Like you really would." She said.  
  
"Oh, believe me. I wouldn't hesitate. I doubt he'd ever want to talk to you after that."  
  
"You know, I'm relieved. I thought for a minute there you were actually going to threaten me."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"It means that you don't scare me anymore. You may have your dark, marred little past in your back pocket, but I'll always have good friends and real ingenuity on my side."  
  
"The same ingenuity that caused Ron to walk out on you right before you were about to 'prove your love' to each other in a perfect storybook fashion?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah, it is." She said. "The same ingenuity that made me feel like I didn't deserve true love ever again after what happened with Chuck and I. The same ingenuity that made me feel like no man was ever going to love me after Ron."  
  
"The same ingenuity that makes you a raging, freaked out bitch?" Draco asked.  
  
"The same ingenuity that will one day give me an actual life while you're some pitiful straggler caught in an undertow of dark forces."  
  
"You have no idea what my ingenuity is going to do for me someday." Draco said.  
  
"Haven't you 'done enough' in this school?" she asked. "Haven't you destroyed enough already?"  
  
He stood face to face with her.  
  
"I haven't even gotten started."  
  
"Just remember." She sneered. "The easiest way out is to swim parallel to the shore."  
  
"Really? I never would have guessed."  
  
"Well just remember it Malfoy, because I'm guessing you're going to need that information very, very soon."  
  
"I'd rather die than take your advice." He said.  
  
"You know?" Hermione said. "There are no words to describe what you are, Malfoy. You don't have one kind, empathetic fiber in your whole body. You couldn't sympathize with someone if your life depended on it. You can't listen or help or understand. You make yourself so close-minded that you don't even realize when you aren't paying attention. You can't love anyone so you just fuck them. God forbid you open up to anything and see that sometimes it's not what you want that's important, it's what you need."  
  
He stood up and met her eyes. "Well, I wouldn't want to go against what God forbids."  
  
"You know what the saddest part is?" she asked.  
  
"Oh, do tell."  
  
She looked him squarely in the eye. "You're never even going to know what you're missing." You'll never feel love because you can't recognize it anymore."  
  
"Poor me." He said sarcastically.  
  
Hermione shook her head. Whatever. This was pointless.  
  
"Let's just forget this, then." She put some money down on the table. "It's my fault for breaking our little confrontation rule." She grabbed her bag and headed for the door, a tumult of emotions coursing through her body.  
  
"You're really beautiful when you're angry." Draco said suddenly.  
  
What?  
  
"What?"  
  
"When you're all passionate about something, and you can just see it in your eyes. It's beautiful. I can't explain it." He was looking at her suddenly.  
  
"Thanks." She whispered.  
  
"Sure." With a brush of his hand against her arm, he was gone down the hallway.  
  
And to think, Hermione had thought she was confused thirty seconds ago.  
  
~  
  
Thanks to.  
  
Natasha, potter-reader, D-chan, IvoryClover0, FoReVeR uNkNoWn, draco'sgurl, Ndfan4eva21, bri, zee, snuffles, D109, cloudgal, Anita Blake, Amber, Angle, Stacey, michee, evil child, Rebecca, Casey, Enchantress Potter, Ally, Linteloteiel the Elf Slut (luv the name, btw ^_~), Blackstar, Dasani Black, fAiTh N LiFe, Shayla, Lena, Rina, lolo, Sakura1287 (I'm so glad you stayed with me, it means a lot!), Herbie Werbie, jepa, MiaMaria, The Blind Assassin, hi, sweet, Kay, goldenstar555, AllyCat739, Willangel101, mimi, Goldenberry, Key, Coffee, Femme Fatale, MinMoot, person who left no name, Muffy, blackroseangel69, rosey, Alanna Roseguard, Glossy, Tinuviel Henneth, Hannah, and Princess Aurora. Oh, and of course myself. Just kidding.  
  
I'm loving the feedback, without it I would have absolutely no motivation to write! =;  
  
A few people had questions & requests and things of that sort, so if you want to talk about anything feel free to e-mail me at sugarbreed@yahoo.com. Also it'd be great if anyone who wants to be notified for an update could e-mail me there, too. 


	10. More Talk of Underwear & Chuck's last ch...

Rating: R  
  
Disclaimer: Nothing HP is mine, at all. Not even Oliver Wood, and that makes me sad.  
  
A/N: Ahh I know you all must hate me... I'm very sorry for the insane delay. You know the weird thing? I wrote this chapter in, like, August and didn't like it, and a few days ago I finally gave up trying and reread this and didn't think it was that bad. Basically school just sucks ass and I couldn't really think of anything better than this, so I hope you enjoy. And huge thank yous to everyone who sent me encouraging stuff, you guys are all awesome times ten!  
  
And btw, what the hell is up with this ban on NC-17 stories? Not to sound freaky, but they was always pretty amusing. How sad. If I knew where to send it, they'd be getting a pretty pissed-off sounding e-mail from me.  
  
~  
  
Hermione rolled over in bed Sunday morning.  
  
To see Chuck standing by her bedside.  
  
"Aaaaahhhhh!" she screamed and sat up quickly. "Chuck, what are you doing here? Again." she added as an afterthought.  
  
"I can't do it, Mione." He said.  
  
"Can't do what, act like a decent human?"  
  
"Hey, what's with the attitude? I thought we patched things up last night."  
  
"No, things will never be patched. I was only being civil for Anna's sake." She said, running a hand through her messy hair. "What do you want?"  
  
"I can't do it. I can't wait that long. Anna wanted us to have sex last night, and I told her I couldn't."  
  
"Well, good."  
  
"No, not good. Bad. She thinks I don't love her anymore."  
  
"Do you love her, Chuck?"  
  
"Weather or not you believe me, yes, I do. And I didn't want to hurt her, but I had to last night."  
  
"Well, you'd hurt her even more by sleeping with her before telling her what we did."  
  
"Mione, it's not what we did. It's what I did, and you paid the price for. She'll be able to forgive you, I know. It's me she'll never talk to again."  
  
"Chuck, get over it. Your life revolves solely around sex."  
  
"And?"  
  
"If you and Anna have the connection you claim, then this shouldn't even be a problem. In the long run when you had sex isn't going to matter nearly as much as why."  
  
"Come on. Not everything has to be interpreted so profoundly. Not everyone's life amounts to great, wonderful, awe-inspiring things."  
  
"And if you want your life to amount to anything you have to step back and realize that what you're feeling right now is going to be forgotten as soon as something better comes along. As soon as you have sex with her, all this stuff isn't going to matter. It'll be over. You'll have a new perspective on life. The connection you feel is going to make you want to forget anything you ever thought before."  
  
They were silent for a minute.  
  
"I want it to be something." Chuck said after a minute.  
  
"Then go and talk to her." Hermione said, desperate to get Chuck gone, but desperate to help at the same time. "Turn it into something."  
  
"Okay. You're right. I've got to make it important to both of us. It has to be life-changing."  
  
"Chuck, it's not going to be life changing. Believe me, I would know. But it definitely can be life... altering. You get it?"  
  
He nodded. "So... breakfast?"  
  
She rolled her eyes. "Let me get dressed."  
  
~  
  
"So, Chuck, you're from."  
  
"Manhattan. It's part of New York."  
  
"And what brings you here?"  
  
"Well, I graduated from school last year, and I came down to visit Mione for fun. We're. old friends."  
  
"That's great." Harry looked at the strange guy sitting across from him. "I guess I'll have to get Mione to fill me in on the details later."  
  
"Right, sure. I will. Chuck's not staying for too long."  
  
"Yeah. Gotta get back to my, uh, job. And stuff." He shoved the food into his mouth. "Hey, Mione? What exactly is this I'm eating?" She rolled her eyes.  
  
"Chuck already got hit on by Parvati and Lavender, so there's not much else for him to do today." Hermione said to Harry, leaning back in her chair.  
  
"Hey." Chuck said suddenly. "Where's that guy you were with last night?" Hermione paused mid-chew.  
  
"W-what guy? I'm not sure I know what you're talking about." Her toast suddenly felt too dry against her tongue.  
  
"You know, the one with the blond ha-"  
  
"Chuck, I wasn't with anybody last night." Harry looked at her inquisitively.  
  
"What's he talking about, Mione?"  
  
"I really have no idea." She said, glaring at Chuck to get her message across.  
  
"Oh, there he is!" Chuck said, pointing at Malfoy, who was walking past them towards his table.  
  
Harry choked on his food. "Malfoy? What could you have possibly been doing with him?"  
  
"N-no, I wasn't w-, I mean, we weren't-"  
  
"Yes you were." Chuck said obliviously. "You were in that classroom and he had his hands-"  
  
"OH THAT!" Hermione bellowed, causing a few heads to turn. "Oh, um, Malfoy was trying to steal my bookbag, and we were having a particularly heated argument when Chuck showed up."  
  
It appeared she'd finally gotten through to him.  
  
"Yep. That's it." Chuck quickly returned to his food.  
  
Hermione looked across the room to where Malfoy was sitting and breathed out a sigh of relief.  
  
"So, Chuck." She said. "Tell us how you learned how to apparate onto Hogwarts grounds."  
  
"Ah, if I told you that, I'd have to kill you." He said. Hermione laughed weakly. Across the Great Hall she noticed Malfoy getting up to leave.  
  
"Well, guys, I gotta go." She said.  
  
"To where?" Harry seemed a bit desperate to not be left alone with Chuck.  
  
"Just the library, I'll be back in ten minutes, promise."  
  
She quickly got up and followed Malfoy, who had since wandered into the hallway. As soon as Hermione knew she was out of sight, she yelled after him.  
  
"Hey, Malfoy!"  
  
He turned around, and smirked at the sight of her.  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"Just to apologize for last night."  
  
"Don't bother, Granger."  
  
"No, but I want to." She looked up at him.  
  
"The thing is, I still want to, you know, learn from you. I'm sorry because I know we promised never to confront each other like that. And I still hate you but-" she looked at his eyes. "But you, well, you're certainly the right person to learn from."  
  
He was silent for a moment. "Then I guess I'll be seeing you Saturday," he said, his tone distinctly of the you-need-me-so-I-suppose-I'll-comply-for- you variety.  
  
"Yeah." Hermione smiled. "Saturday." She looked at him for two seconds too long, and then quickly turned to leave.  
  
"Oh, wait a minute, Granger." He said. She turned around.  
  
"I got you a little something." He said, digging through his bag and pulling out a brown paper sack. "Here."  
  
She smiled, extremely surprised. "You didn't have to do tha-" she stopped upon looking in the bag.  
  
"What is this supposed to be?" Hermione pulled out a tiny, lacy pink bra with matching panties. Miniscule panties.  
  
"Oh come on, Granger." He stepped closer to her. "It's for your up-and- coming night with Weasley." He leaned into her to whisper in her ear. "And you and I both know that pink is your color." He tugged gently on the hem of her skirt and let one finger brush her leg gently.  
  
With a final smirk he was off, leaving Hermione standing there, smiling like a schoolgirl. Oh, wait...  
  
She tucked the package into her bag and returned to the Great Hall. So he remembered what they had- almost- done. And obviously it hadn't meant anything to him. That was okay. She was over it. Sort of.  
  
~  
  
"Mione, I need that weird green liquid you've been smiling dopily at for the past fifteen minutes."  
  
"Oh." She said. "Here." They were making some sort of antidote in Potions.  
  
"What is wrong with you?" asked Harry.  
  
"I don't know." Hermione said.  
  
"Where's that guy you were with before?"  
  
"Chuck? He went back to America." Hermione said vacantly.  
  
"How did you know him?"  
  
"We were just friends. I went to visit my cousin Anna there and I met him."  
  
"And that's it?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"It really seems like you guys have certainly had some past together." Harry said.  
  
"No we haven't." Hermione was shocked from her mysterious high. "What is that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Nothing. it's just."  
  
"Just what?"  
  
"After you left we got to talking, sort of, and the just the way he would get when the conversation was about you was..." Harry trailed off.  
  
"Are you a virgin?" Harry asked suddenly. Hermione's vial slipped through her fingers and smashed onto the floor.  
  
"Well, clean it up!" Snape barked. She bent down and began to clear the mess. Harry crouched down to further pursue the conversation.  
  
"Where did that question come from?" she hissed.  
  
"Nowhere. I'm just curious."  
  
"You're never just curious, Harry. Are you asking for Ron?'  
  
"No!"  
  
"Do you think that I slept with Chuck?" she asked.  
  
"Honestly, yeah, I sort of do."  
  
"What? Just because he was my friend once you assume I've slept with him? Do I seem like that kind of girl, Harry, my best friend of seven years? Don't you think I would've told you?"  
  
Hermione felt terrible lying. The truth would have to come out someday. But she knew that if she admitted her actions, Ron would know of them in two seconds flat.  
  
"No, there was just something between you two. Like you aren't really good friends anymore because you slept with him."  
  
"You're crazy." She stood up, and winced as one of the glass pieces sliced into her hand.  
  
"Shit."  
  
"You okay?"  
  
"Fine." She said, trying to apply pressure to the cut. "Professor Snape? Can I go to the hospital wing?"  
  
"Miss Granger, I'll ask you to not disrupt my entire class every time you receive a minor wound."  
  
"But can I-"  
  
"NO!"  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes and wrapped one of her handkerchiefs around it. She was afraid to use a healing spell with Snape watching over her. "Pain is life," He would say, and deduct points from her.  
  
"So?" Harry said.  
  
"So what?"  
  
"Are you?"  
  
"Harry, let it go." She said. "You jump to conclusions so easily."  
  
"Just answer me."  
  
"No, this is unfair. And I'm not refusing to answer because I'm not a virgin, so don't think that. It's an unjustifiable question that doesn't deserve an answer. You just want to know for Ron and you're using Chuck as a 'valid' excuse for questioning. Don't make someone you don't know do your dirty work. "  
  
"Come on. I was just wondering. Honestly."  
  
"Have you and Ginny had sex?" She asked.  
  
"No! We're just friends." Harry said, blushing. It was common knowledge that Harry wanted to be "more than friends" with Ginny.  
  
"So? According to you, that question is completely fair. I have a suspicion that you guys have had sex, and I think it's perfectly normal for me to ask you out of the blue just like that."  
  
"Fine. Discussion over." Harry said.  
  
"Good." Hermione replied. "And don't go scampering off to report this to Ron, either."  
  
"Fine." Harry said again. They were silent for a few moments. "Not that I was asking for him or anything."  
  
"Oh, shit." Hermione said again, as blood seeped through her handkerchief and onto her robes. "Great." She was just about to ask Snape to go to the hospital wing again when she felt a strong heat surging through her hand. It soon gave way to a slight tingling sensation, and then it was over.  
  
"What." Hermione looked down to examine her injured hand, hoping she hadn't gotten some poison or something in the wound.  
  
She blinked upon noticing all the blood was gone off her handkerchief. She pulled the cloth off her hand to notice the wound was gone. What was going on here? Why was all the blood gone?  
  
Hermione glanced around the room, only to notice Ron holding his wand. She met his eyes, until he half-smiled and gave his wand a slight twirl. Hermione raised an eyebrow at him, meeting his eyes as if a reason for his actions was about to scroll across his forehead in bright neon letters.  
  
"Mione!" Harry said, trying to get her attention. She was so surprised that she bumped the table, and another beaker crashed to the floor.  
  
"MISS GRANGER!" Snape cried. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, RUINING ALL OF MY EXPENSIVE EQUIPMENT? SEE ME AFTER CLASS AND TEN POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR!"  
  
Hermione sighed and tucked her hair behind her ear. She managed to finish the potion just before the bell rang.  
  
"See ya." Harry said, quickly ducking out of the classroom.  
  
"Bye." She said, working to clean up her part of the mess.  
  
"Miss Granger, I need to speak with you." Snape called.  
  
"Yes sir, just a moment." She finished at the table and walked up to his desk. He was busy writing something and she stood expectantly.  
  
Suddenly she felt a voice in her ear.  
  
"Can we talk?"  
  
"What, now?" She said sarcastically.  
  
"Miss Granger, due to your destructive behavior, you will be serving detention with me this Friday night." Snape said.  
  
"Of course. I understand, Professor." She answered methodically, not listening.  
  
"I'll see you at eight o'clock."  
  
"Of course."  
  
"You're dismissed, Miss Granger." He eyed her suspiciously. "And try not to break anything else on your way out." She smiled and made a beeline for the door.  
  
"Mione! Wait up."  
  
Sigh. " What do you want?"  
  
"Did you like my healing spell?"  
  
"It was a life shattering experience."  
  
"I was just  
  
"No."  
  
"What's going on with you?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Just in general. You've been acting so weird."  
  
"How would you know? You haven't been around me lately."  
  
"Look-"  
  
"I knew you were having Harry report back on my actions. Come on, Ron. Get a life, please. You have new a woman to worry about now, okay?"  
  
"Mione, what's wrong with you?" Ron asked. "You seem so. detached"  
  
"I. just have some new things to occupy my time lately. I haven't been quite so obsessed with you anymore."  
  
"Mione-"  
  
"But I have to go, okay? See you around. And say hi to Sara for me." She turned around. Confrontations were never her strong point. "And thanks for the hand."  
  
"What are you doing with Malfoy?" Ron suddenly called out. She turned to face him.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You heard me."  
  
"I-I'm not doing anything with Malfoy."  
  
"I think you are. Harry told me about what happened at breakfast, where that guy said that you had been with Malfoy the night before."  
  
"He tried to steal my bag! We were just having an argument when Chuck showed up."  
  
"Right. Mione, you've always been a terrible liar."  
  
"Ron, you don't have the right to interfere in my life anymore. Last time I checked, we weren't really close friends anymore."  
  
"So? If you're doing something with Malfoy, it could be dangerous."  
  
"Ron? SHUT UP!" she yelled. Ron blinked a few times.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You sound like my mother or something." She said. "And maybe I am doing 'something' with Malfoy. It's not like I'd tell you."  
  
"Don't do this to me. Come on."  
  
"What? Are you jealous or something?" she asked.  
  
"Jealous of what? A relationship you've obviously fabricated in your mind?" his face was calm, but his eyes were nervous. "How could you want to go near him after everything he's ever done to you? To Harry? To me, even?"  
  
"You know, maybe I should go for Malfoy." Hermione said noncommittally. "I'm sure he'd be really good in bed, at any rate."  
  
"Mione!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"How can you even mention, you know, doing that with someone like Malfoy?"  
  
"It's easy."  
  
"You don't want your first time to be with him."  
  
"No. I don't." she said.  
  
"So then."  
  
"Look. In case you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly the bookish little girl I used to be. I'm different. And I don't want to graduate and go into the world knowing nothing about sex. And that's that."  
  
"Stay away from him, Mione. I don't know what's wrong with you, but you're just going to get hurt. And since when were you so anxious to jump into bed with guys who would never care about you?"  
  
"Um, let me think. Maybe since the night I realized that loving and caring about guys gets you absolutely nowhere?"  
  
"Are you going to blame me for that your whole life?" he asked.  
  
"IT WAS YOUR FAULT!" she cried, frustrated.  
  
"I freaked out. It just wasn't meant to be, okay? It know that that hurts y-"  
  
"It doesn't hurt anymore." She said. "Someday that's going to be one of the bigger mistakes of your life, Ron. But in the meantime, you've got someone new, and... I do too."  
  
"Mione."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You don't know him. Whoever he is. Malfoy especially."  
  
"You don't either. Whoever he is. Malfoy especially," she repeated mockingly.  
  
"So you're just going to go off traipsing through bed linens with a total stranger?"  
  
"I never said I was going to sleep with the guy." She said.  
  
"But-"  
  
"I just strongly hinted at it, that's all."  
  
"Are you trying to make me jealous?"  
  
"No, but seeing as you are, I'm certainly enjoying it."  
  
"I'm just concerned is all," he said, swallowing hard.  
  
"Come on, Ron. I wanted to have sex with you, remember? But now. there's something about a fresh new start with a new guy. No past, no future. Just the promise of an extremely pleasure-filled present. And if it happens to be with Malfoy, then so be it. I'm ready, and I'm sure he'd be willing to help me out." She reached over and touched his arm. "You can have Sara all you want. Don't hold yourself back because of me."  
  
"I-I. it's not like that with us." He said.  
  
"Now that I think of it, the idea of Malfoy is sounding better and better. He's attractive, experienced, and certainly fervent about the subject at hand."  
  
"The thought of you with him is just so-"  
  
"Arousing, if you ask me. The ultimate bad-boy fantasy, right? Sure, we've had a bit of a clashing in the past, but I think it would just provide a fuel for an extremely passion-filled night. Or two. Or three. Or more."  
  
"Ek-" Ron said. "J-just."  
  
"Don't worry, though. It was just a silly idea. Malfoy would never agree to something like that with someone like me. Although I'm sure I could find some way to persuade him."  
  
"Mione." He said.  
  
"Yes?" she asked.  
  
"Um. You shouldn't-, I mean, you can't, no, t-this is just a, you know, not good. Bad. Bad idea."  
  
"Hmm, maybe you've got a point. I should probably focus my attentions on someone else, right?"  
  
He breathed out heavily. "Yeah. Right. That's what I meant."  
  
"I just want to make sure that whatever time I have with this guy is scintillatingly erotic and stimulating, you know? It has to be all that I imagine. I don't mean to come off as slutty, but don't you think it's time I finally did all that stuff that normal teenagers do?"  
  
"Um..." Ron didn't seem too interested in spluttering something else out.  
  
"Well." She smiled. "You seem pretty satisfied. But I gotta go now." She leaned into his ear. "Just remember, now is definitely not the time to hold back anything. And I mean that for both you and I."  
  
"Huh. Right." he said, too ambivalent on the situation for further conversation.  
  
"Oh, and Ron?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't tell anyone about this? I mean, not too many people really know about my sex life, and I don't necessarily want it to get around. Wouldn't want to attract the wrong sort of crowd, you know?"  
  
"S-sure."  
  
"Thanks." She gave a little wave, and was off.  
  
~  
  
Okay, great. Mission accomplished. So why didn't she feel like she'd actually gotten somewhere?  
  
Maybe because she'd manipulated one of her best friends? Even if they weren't really speaking, she still had six other years of friendship to fall back on.  
  
Yes, she was interested in sex. But with him, not someone else, right? Hopefully, he'd have a long hard talk with himself about the whole thing, and when she finally made her move on him it would be a welcome one.  
  
Then they'd have a night of great sex, and he'd be so impressed by her newfound skills that he'd fall in love with her all over again and they'd live happily ever after.  
  
It was a slightly warped way of approaching things though, wasn't it? Hermione hadn't known herself capable of concocting a plan like this, never mind carrying it out.  
  
Sure, if all went well she'd get her classic Cinderella-style ending, but wouldn't the whole purpose be defeated if it hadn't been accomplished honestly? Fairy tales weren't supposed to happen this way.  
  
Was all the deceit really worth it? Hermione leaned against a wall and breathed out heavily.  
  
More than that, was Ron worth it?  
  
~  
  
Hopefully the next chapter will not take so long. I probably won't have one out before then, so everyone have a good time at the 2nd HP movie, which I know you'll all go see the day it comes out. (November 15th here, probably where you are too, hopefully they'll have more scenes with Oliver this time ~_^)  
  
Thanks to...  
  
Claudia, boregirl, sassy, sk8ter gurl, Mandy, Danielle, angel_faerie32, lovely me, LadyJenn, daniel's love, TFG, Alanna Roseguard, bri, katarina, dragoness666, RainDancer, snufflemuffle, Kay, fanatical-goddess, j.j. alan, lizzie-star08, joyce, emma, Melanie, ice-heart04, SophieBabe, Lizzie, IvoryClover, dracosrockstar, KatarinaEvanla, Julie, chloe, Kathie, alex, Natasha, slia-chan, Nysa, sakura1287, Alexa Pryne, pookie bear, Georgia- peach007, goldenstar555, Herbie, Fire Belle, Nicole, Anna, Rebecca, Alannah- pearl, Chikita, roray126, Willangel 101, Lady Jade, Snufalufagus (he was my favorite ~_^), sunshine, mimi, potter reader, Glossy, michee, Kitten, zee, scythefire, Liesel, angelmonkey, novasenshi, anna, Cassondra, Rosebud, Rina, Draco's one and only, Guineve 126@aol.com (I suppose I'm not failing English for nothing), Fiery Slut, harrypottermagic32, February Dreams, Oceana Black, MiaMaria, nicki-day, Kathy, tree, arto (you probably don't remember what you wrote, but your review was great), Linteloteiel the Elf Slut, Jenn, Desha, Holly, Chanel, bumblebee, ~KC~ , and Luna. And a few people who left no name.  
  
I hope I got you all, and sorry if anyone's name is wrong. Also if you didn't get an update and wanted one, I'm sorry. If you could e-mail me that would be great, and if you did and didn't get one then I must be more scatterbrained than I thought. 


	11. Not too sexeducative, sorry but you migh...

Rating: R

Disclaimer:  Nothing concerning HP, Escaflowne, or Cruel Intentions is mine, except a soundtrack and various paraphernalia.

A/N:  Ahhhhhh!  I am such a bad person.  I know!  It's been FOUR months!  I'm so sorry.  I really feel so bad, especially since you guys are all so great and leave me so many reviews.  I almost cried when I saw that I had over 500!  

Just two quick things:  My spacebar has issues, so I'm really sorry if there are a bunch of words stuck together.  I tried to go through and get rid of them all, but I think I probably missed some.  Also, I realized that when I try to do ellipses, it only comes up as one dot.  So instead of "I (dot dot dot) love you", it comes up as "I (dot) love you."  Grrrrr. 

~

Hermione groaned as she woke up on Saturday morning.  Her arms were stiff from scrubbing bottles for Snape during her detention the previous night.

She started to sit up, and gave a yelp as she toppled off the edge of her queen-sized bed.

"Jesus Christ." She mumbled, pushing back her hair, which was currently incognito as a bird's nest.

"Ow." She stood up and climbed back into bed, giving a yelp as her leg brushed someone else's.  Hermione quickly pushed back the covers. 

"Gin?!" she cried, shaking her friend awake.  "What are you doing here?  You scared me half to death!"

"Huh?" Ginny asked, opening her eyes halfway.  "What are you doing in my bed?"

"You're in my bed!" Hermione said, just a little bit angry.  "_Why_ are you in my bed?"

"I don't know." Ginny giggled.  Then her eyes got wide. "Have you talked to Harry yet?" she yawned.

"Of course not.  I just woke up, for crying out loud."

"Oh.  Well he looooooves me." She said sleepily, rolling over.  "He told me last night."

"That's great, Gin." Hermione was still completely puzzled.  "When?"

"Maybe it was more like this morning.  I just remember that it was dark."

"That's great." She repeated, sinking back into the covers herself.  There would be time to figure everything out later.  Right now it was five forty three A.M. and she needed some more sleep quite desperately.

"So what did he say?" Hermione mumbled.

"I don't remember." Ginny said.  "He woke me up and I was in bed, and I told him I had a really bad headache, which I think I still do, and then he just- I don't know."  She smiled.

"We can figure it out later.  There's no need to worry about it." Hermione was half asleep already.

"Right." Ginny was drifting off herself.  "Later.  I'm so happy though, Mione.  It's like my dreams have come true."

"Mmm." Hermione said, rolling her head close to Ginny's.  "That's great."

"What the hell is going on here!?" Someone suddenly yelped from the other edge of the bed.

Hermione and Ginny both started screaming and managed to fall off the bed, toppling on top of each other.

"There. Is. Someone. Else. In. the. Bed." Ginny whispered very seriously from her position on Hermione's stomach.  "That. Could. Be. A. Problem."

"Hey.  What's going on?" Harry's groggy face suddenly appeared over both girls.

"_Harry_?" Hermione said.  "What the hell are you doing here?"

He shrugged.  "I don't know."  Hermione wriggled from underneath Ginny and stood up.

"Is there anybody else in there? She asked, crawling onto the bed and scavenging through the sheets.

"I think it's just us." Harry said.

"Great." Hermione replied, sitting back.  Ginny hoisted herself up to join them on the mattress.

"I have such a bad headache." She said, yawning and pushing her red hair away from her face.

"What happened last night?" asked Hermione. 

"I was at a party." Ginny said.  "I think.  I was just really mad that they had postponed the dance." She sounded as though everything was just rushing back to her.

"The dance is postponed?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah." Harry said, getting a bit of a rush himself.  "Dumbledore made this announcement at dinner.  I think you were already at detention."

"Oh." Hermione blinked.

"And then Harry was going to be away at that Dark Magic Convention that weekend, so I kind of got really sad when I realized that we wouldn't be able to go together."

"I see."

"So then I went to this party up at someone's dorm room that Lavender told me about.  And I guess I got really drunk, but all I remember is having jell-o so I really don't know how that happened."

Hermione made a mental note to explain later.

"Okay." She said.  "That still doesn't explain why you guys are here."

"Um." They exchanged a look.  "I guess we don't know." Ginny said.

"Wait, I remember." Harry picked up the story. "I came to look for Ginny because I had been talking to Ron and I just finally wanted to tell her how I felt." He shared a little look with the read-headed girl next to him.  "And she wasn't in her room so I came to ask you if you knew where I could find her."

"Oh." Hermione said again.

"And you were asleep but Ginny was in your bed, so I laid down and we talked for a while.  I just wanted to make sure she fell asleep okay."

"But you fell asleep yourself?" Hermione finished.

"I guess so." Harry said.

"How come you were in my bed at all?" Hermione asked Ginny.

"I think I sort of remember Parvati taking me back here.  I guess I was really out of it.  She probably didn't know where my room was."

"And she couldn't just take you back to hers." Hermione mumbled.

Harry shrugged.

"Sounds right to me." He said.

Hermione rubbed her temples.  "This is so weird."

The other two nodded in agreement.

"So..." Ginny said.  "Back to sleep?"

"Great." Hermione said, relieved that she could get some more rest.

"Sounds good." Harry nodded.

The all slid back underneath the covers, but Hermione woke up only twenty minutes later to the sound of her two bunkmates making out.

"You guys!" she said.  "Get a room!  Preferably one that's _not_ mine."

"Sorry." They mumbled, but it was apparent neither had any intention of moving.  Hermione groaned and rolled out of bed.  She looked around the room briefly, but there was no other place that appealed to her sense of sleep.

Hermione yawned and pulled on her bathrobe, and then left the room for the only other place she was guaranteed a bed.

~

"Hey Parvati?  Lavender?  You guys in here?" she opened the door to her old room and peered in.  All the curtains were shut and the room was dark.  Hermione figured they wouldn't mind if she visited her old bed, so she crept over to it and pulled back the curtains.  She smiled in relief at the sight of a completely other-people-free bed and wasted no time climbing in.

~

Nine fifty two.  Less than four hours of sleep later, Hermione was up again to the sound of the shower running.  She'd always hated the fact that her bed was right in front of the bathroom.  

Hermione sighed as she sat up, feeling admittedly more refreshed but still a bit groggy.  She figured she ought to go and thank Parvati for her semi-selfless actions last night.  

Hermione tiptoed over to her bed and pulled back the curtains.  Parvati was completely covered from head to toe by her sheets.

"Hey Parvati?  You awake?"

"Grgg." Came the reply.

"I just wanted to thank you for last night." Hermione said on the edge of the bed.  "For helping out Ginny.  She never thinks straight when she gets emotional."

"Hmm."

"You know, I woke up with her in my bed and I just about had a heart attack.  And then it turned out that Harry was in my bed, too.  There was quite a bit of explaining going on in _there_ this morning."

"Nnng."

"And now Harry and Ginny are going out, which is really sweet and they're so perfect for each other and all, but it just sort of makes me feel, I don't know, jealous maybe.  Of what they have.  I thought about what you said to me that one day about doing what you want, and I've been trying, you know?  But the only thing is that I can't seem to figure out exactly what it is that I want."

Parvati was silent.

"I know you're half asleep and all, but I really just don't know what to do."

Hermione paused.  "Hey Pav?  You awake?"

Parvati rolled over.  "I was, but your talking has practically put me to sleep."  

Hermione screamed.

"_Malfoy_?" she asked, scrambling away from him.

"The one and only." He sat up, letting the sheets fall as far down his body as they could get without being scandalous.  She immediately clapped a hand over her eyes.

"It's nothing you've never seen before." He said.  "Parvati's in the shower."

"Hrmmm." She said, uncovering her eyes.

"I thought that you were Parvati." She said dazedly.  "Did I say anything really stupid just now?" she asked.  

"I wasn't really listening." He said.

"Good." She said, blinking.  "I should go.  Because I'm lying in sheets that you just had sex in.  And I should go."

"Not so fast, Granger." He grabbed her wrist.

"Oh, as fast as I possibly can." She said.

"Ah ah ah." He grabbed her other wrist and pinned her hands down on the bed.  She bit her lip.

"I though you weren't allowed to have sex with the same girl more than once." She said.

"When did I say that?" he replied, fixing her with an innocent stare.  

"I figured it was in the handbook or something."

"There's set rules for being irresistibly sexy."

"Too bad." She replied, chastising herself for loving the way his hair looked, absolutely unkempt.

"Parvati was all over me last night.  Drunk, no doubt." He shrugged.  "But, whatever, right?"

"Sure." She said, a nagging feeling spreading through her stomach.  "Let me go?"

He shook his head.  "Not before I hear whatever you have on your mind."

"Why the hell do you care?" she asked, eager to get far, far away from this bed.

"Because I know it has something to do with me."

"It has nothing to do with you." She said.  "Not everyone thinks solely of you."

"I never said they did."

"Of course you didn't." she said quietly.

"Then what _are_ you thinking of?"

She blinked.  "Escaflowne." Hermione herself was surprised to hear what she'd been thinking of.

He released her hands and rolled onto his side.  "I don't speak French."

"It's not French." She sat up and rested on the edge of the bed, her back to him.  "It's a TV show.  My cousin Anna loves it."  Hermione rubbed her wrists.

Draco stood up and pulled on his leather pants, then sat on the other edge, his back to her.

"The Zaibach empire was trying to destroy the planet Gaea, and the only way they could do it was to separate this girl Hitomi and this guy Van, because her love for him, plus her psychic powers, were the only thing that could give him enough power to operate his guymelef, Escaflowne, and defeat the Zaibachs."

"So?" Draco asked.

"So the Zaibach leader Dornkirk invented this machine that would change people's fates.  It literally changed people's fates.  And then all this other stuff happened, and Zaibach came and took Hitomi back with them."

Draco shrugged.  "So how did it end?"

Hermione paused.  "I never saw the ending." 

She looked over at him, and then closed her eyes.  "This morning everyone woke up in someone else's bed." She said slowly.  "Except me."

"That's your own fault." He said.

Hermione ignored him.  "I used to watch Escaflowne with Chuck, and after that episode where everyone's fates got fucked up, I looked over at him and he told me he loved me." She paused.  "He said that maybe we were never even supposed to meet, but it didn't matter because we had."

Draco abstained from comment.

"The morning I woke up in his bed, I had a few seconds of this perfect feeling.  That maybe this wasn't my fate.  That maybe it was so wonderful because it wasn't supposed to happen."

"And?"

"And it wasn't supposed to happen." She said, laughing sadly.  "And I kept think about how he'd said that maybe we weren't supposed to meet.  And how I would've been much better off if we hadn't."

He shrugged.  "It was just a line, Granger."

"I know." She said.  "I know he never meant it.  But when Ron broke up with me, I got that same feeling.  What if I had never met him and Harry?  What if I hadn't come into their compartment on the train to Hogwarts the first year looking for Neville's toad?  What if Ron and I were supposed to get married and have a million kids?  Or just stay friends?"

"You can bore yourself to death all you want with what ifs." Malfoy said.  

"But you can only see how one road ends." She said.  "And most of the time you're just as unsure as when you started.  Maybe the Zaibachs could change fate, but at least they knew what they wanted.  Fate is fate for a reason." She closed her eyes.  "That's why I never wanted to see the end of Escaflowne.  I was afraid it would end just the way I wanted, with Van and Hitomi in love.  Because that would have meant that no matter how much you fuck things up, they always end up making sense."

Draco stood up and walked around to Hermione's side of the bed, then rested one hand on either side of her body.

"So whose bed did you want to wake up in?" he asked, smiling slyly.

Hermione tried to calm her slightly fluttering heart before mumbling that she didn't know.

"Then what the fuck are you complaining about?" he asked, standing upright once more.

Hermione leapt up in indignation.

"I'm not complaining!" she said, folding her arms.  "And you are the world's worst listener."

"I didn't ask to hear all that." He said.

"Well.  Fine." Hermione said.  "I don't know why I told you."

"Hmm." Draco said, standing up and folding his own arms over his bare chest.  "People spend half their lives talking and the other half wondering why nothing ever happens."

"How witty of you." Hermione said, rolling her eyes.

"Well, then tell me you disagree with me." He said.

"I disagree with you." She said.  

"Why?"

"Because that's not necessarily true." She said.

"Prove to me it's not." He smiled and took a step closer to her.

"Fine." She said indignantly.  "Just tell me how I can prove it to you."

He pondered for a moment.

"What's the one thing you want most in the world?" Draco asked.

"I wish they'd stop cutting down the rainforests-"

"Fuck the rainforests." He said, cutting her off.

"No, thanks." She said, raising her eyebrow.  

"Get him back." Draco said.

"What?" she asked.

"Get Weasley back within the next two weeks until the ball.  And then you'll have proved to me that people aren't all talk."

"That's ridiculous." Hermione said as her stomach dropped just a little.

"No.  No it isn't." he smiled.  "I know he's all you think about."

"He's not." Hermione said, blushing at the amount of time she'd spent not thinking about Ron lately.

"If you don't want to do this..." he said.  "Then don't."

"What, and let you prove your superiority?  I don't think so."

"Then you're going to do it?" he said.

"How do you know what you've taught me will even work?" she asked.  "Ron could be totally uninterested in all of it."

"So take the risk." He said.  "Unless you don't think he's worth it."

"He's worth it!" she said, a bit too loudly.  

"Then what's the problem?" he asked, looking down on her.

"There isn't one." She said remorsefully.  "But I can't do that to him." She said, shaking her head.

"What do you mean?" Draco asked.

"I can't force myself back together with him just to prove something to you."

"Why would you have to 'force' yourself back together with him?" Malfoy asked.

"I wouldn't." Hermione's head was spinning.  "But when it does happen, I want it to be the right time.  I want to let it happen naturally."

Draco stepped closer to her.  "Your fucking clock is ticking." He said.  "The time we all have left at Hogwarts is running out."

"Look, Malfoy, I don't care about forcing this. There's no one at Hogwarts or anywhere that I'd rather be with that Ron."

"You just said a minute ago that you'd do anything to prove it to me."

"Well, I guess I won't." she said quietly.  "I don't..."

"What?" he asked, folding his arms.

"I don't think we should do this anymore." 

"Fine." Malfoy said.  "Take the easy road."

"I'm not taking the easy road." She said.  "All I'm saying is that I think it was a bad idea that we ever started these lessons."

"Why?" he asked, smirking.  "Am I just too much for you?"

Hermione shook her head, biting back tears.  Maybe she'd grown ten years in the last two minutes, or maybe her conscience was just finally kicking in.

"Because whenever I say that I love Ron, I don't feel it anymore." She said.  

"But you just said..." Draco said.

"I know what I just said!" she yelled.  The tears finally escaped her eyes.  "I can't stop contradicting myself."

"So what the fuck do you want!" he finally yelled.  "I don't care about your feelings or your life, Granger.  But I think that if you leave this room right now, and I never see you again..." he stopped.

"Then what?" Hermione asked.

"I'll regret it." He said, turning away from her.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"There's something about you." He said.  "Something I can't stand about you.  Something that makes me think that I could talk to you forever and never run out of things to say."

"So?" she replied.

"So nothing." Malfoy replied.  "So maybe you're different.  But you have to know that you're different."

"I don't know anything about myself." She said.

"I've hated you for so long.  There were times when all I thought about was how much better things would be if only you could just go away."

"I could never forgive all the things you've done to me.  Or my friends." She said.

"And you do love Weasley." He said.  "You do.  Weather or not you know it."

"When I woke up with Harry and Ginny in my bed this morning, the first thing I thought about was Ron." Hermione began.  "But the second thing I thought about was freedom."

"How interesting." He said icily.

"I though about how much happier I would be if I didn't have to chase after Ron anymore.  When we first fell in love I though that was it for me.  But that wasn't it."

"The world is set out to fuck you up, Granger, what can I say?  You want me to sympathize with you?  Fine, life is shit, okay?  We can pretend it's all going to work out for us, but it won't."

Hermione moved to stand behind him and whispered in his ear.

"I think that you've never looked sexier, just the way you are when you wake up." She said.

"Well, I try." He answered automatically.

"And I think that I've never wanted you more than I do right now."  She leaned her head down and slowly kissed his bare shoulder.

"And I just think that all I want to do right now is kiss you."

He turned his head to the side.

"Why?"

"I don't know." She replied, smiling.

Hermione let her eyes drop closed and leaned down to touch her lips to his.  She'd kissed him before, but this was by far the most wonderful thing she'd ever felt.

Hermione readily opened her mouth to his tongue, and let her hands wander along his soft skin.  

Before she knew it, they had collapsed onto the bed and were kissing with a desirous vigor Hermione had never before experienced.  She wanted him, quite desperately, in fact.

"Mmm." She said as he kissed her neck and began to lift up her shirt. She knew he wasn't wearing anything under his pants and refrained from taking them of just yet. 

"Is there anyone here?" she mumbled.

"All of Parvati's roommates are gone, and she must still be in the bathroom."  

Hermione was suddenly grateful that her old roommate always took hours in the bathroom every morning.

Her pajama pants had since been discarded, and Draco was concentrating on kissing her all the way down her body.  He stopped tantalizingly at the top of her panties, then repositioned himself to kiss her mouth.

"You didn't have to stop." She said.  "I could've handled it." 

He only smiled.  "I somehow disagree."  Draco slid his hands up her back and removed her bra in record time.  "How do you feel right now?" he asked.

She laughed.  "I can't describe it."

"Have you wanted me for a long time?" he whispered into her neck.

"Yes." She moaned slightly.

"Are you absolutely burning with desire for me?" he asked, running a lazy hand up her thigh.

"Yes." She breathed.

"And you're sure you want to do this?" he asked.

"Of course." She replied. Draco smiled.

"You're positive?" He said.  "You know that once you sleep with me, we can't go back."

She paused, biting her lip.  "I'm not positive I won't regret it someday.  But it won't be anytime soon."

Draco smiled again.

"Then there's just one thing I'm going to need."  He slid backwards towards Parvati's nightstand and grabbed a piece of parchment and a quill.

"What's that for?" she asked.

He tore of an unused corner of the parchment and scribbled something on it.

"What?" Hermione asked again.  He folded the paper, dropped it on her stomach and slid off the bed.   

Her stomach turning over suddenly, she sat up and unfolded the parchment.  

"F.  Signed, Draco Malfoy." She read out loud.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart, but you failed." He leaned over the half-naked girl and kissed her loudly and coldly one last time.

"What?" she asked, absolutely frozen in place.

"My lessons.  You failed."

Hermione's drew in a sharp breath.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"All that shit I fed you about how you were 'different?'  How could you betray your one true love for someone like me?" he mused sarcastically.  

"You-" Hermione's world suddenly began to disintegrate as she realized what had just happened.

He looked at her. "I told you never to fall for me." He said, and then leaned in closer.  "The mere thought of having sex with you is not only revolting, it's disappointing."

"How could you-"

"If you recall." He cut her off.  "I did absolutely nothing except follow your own lead.  I can't believe that after everything I taught you, you were still so easily swayed by a few kind words."

"You asshole." Hermione whispered.  She had never before in her life felt the urge to curl up and die more than she did right now.  No words would ever be able to hurt him badly enough.

She began pulling on her clothes as fast as she could.

"Oh, don't go." He said mockingly.  "I think that if you leave this room and I never see you again, I'll always regret it."

He smiled sickeningly at her.  

"I knew what I was doing, Granger.  I knew you'd inevitably fall for me.  I've been prepared for a long time now."

Hermione was shaking uncontrollably.

"Don't start crying, now." He said.  "After all, judging from the way you were so ready to let me fuck you, I do believe that Weasley will love everything you have to offer."

Hermione was already smashing his face before he even finished the sentence.

Malfoy reeled back slightly, but ignored the trail of blood running down his face.

"Violence is never the answer." He said preachingly, touching his fingers to the wound.  "Ouch." 

"I can't believe that someone as horrible as you can even exist." She said in a trembling voice.  "I can't imagine how you can live with yourself."

"People like you make it so very easy." He replied.  "And don't worry, I won't tell anyone about this.  You've been through enough." He smiled understandingly. 

Hermione stumbled out of the bed and headed for the door.

"Even after everything you knew about my past, you could still do that to me?" she asked.

"Your past, my dear, inspired me to do this in the first place."

"I thought that-" she began, but was unable to finish.

"What, you really thought I needed the money?" he asked.  "You honestly believed that?  Because from the beginning I only thought it would be a good way to humiliate you one last time." 

Hermione let her face sink into her hands.

"And I guess it worked." She could practically feel his smile burning into her back.

Hermione had been defeated.  And she knew it.  And she knew that he knew it, too.

"Oh, don't forget you report card.  I'm sure your parents would love to know what you've been up to at school."  He dropped the parchment into her hand.  

"Someday." She began, but could only shake her head and exit the room, closing the door to the very worst moment of her life.

*

Okay, that was really a horrible ending.  Once again I am so sorry about the wait, but I just have so much shit to do that I can't stand it.  But I solemnly vow never to go this long again because I know that's how you lose readers.  I love all of you for being such awesome people!

I honestly don't know if I'll ever write for ff.net after this story because I really think it's sort of heading on a downward spiral...  But I most likely will.  I just hate how they're so restrictive now and they try to make up for it by adding all those fancy tools and buttons.  I remember years ago when I used to read Roswell stories and it was so simple but cool.

Anyways, mad thanks to...

Lil' Miss Me, jepa, Crystalline Lily, Amanda, BlacKat, Oriencor, Sora Ketsueki, mary, wajeena, bad gal, Danny, novasenshi, A.K Veralidaine, blur-X-angel, casper, Nysa, LinZ, snapegirl, Obi-Lass, Alie, Crystal Words, Dreaming One, DracosSugar, Eternal Senshi Alexiel, TzAmZ, sakure1287, sailorscully, Elisha, Sammie, muffy, joyce, katiegirl, Me, Rina, Becky468, froggi, Amora-Ryuko, Blackstar, moonlight siren, surfer-girl131, blueberry girl, j.j. alan, Kathrynvalmont, Lilie Blaze, Courtney, DracoLegolasOliver r sexy, me, Paradise in Slytherin, cutie, Evil Snake, unknown, Slytherin Slut, Zelur-Em, mendie, Bisquik, Elitea LeFay, Brandi, Skyla Malfoy, potter-reader, pCt, Goldenberry, Author of Darkness, Athena Tudor, GrrBabyYea, Kay, ~KC~, Coffee, grr argh, DracoDew17, rubberducks, jilly, the brilliant dream, marebear166, jazzyjellybean, err!!!, Glossy, Mistress Desdemona, Katarina Evanla, LadyJenn, MsLessa, daniel's love, Bumblebee-Queen, me, harrypottermagic32, Emma, ambe, Stellar Snape, Wicked-Willow, Ruby Red Gem, Kat, Christine, Dragon Eyes, Beatrix Tribal, Fiery Slut, Mystical Mole, Claudia, Lil' Lily In A Pond, pookie bear, Lizzie-star08, alexandergranger, mimi, Mrs. Wood-Felton, ju, Joanna, Herbie, goldenstar555, Alanna Roseguard, DeStInYvsFaTe, zee, HarryPotter5626, MiaMaria, Rebecca, sk8er gurl, SophieBabe, Snow-Queen, and eight people who didn't leave names… which is weird because I didn't think you could do that.

Hey, I was wondering if any of you reviewers are guys.  I thought some of you might be, but I couldn't tell.  Anyways, it's a bit of a turn-on, so I'd just like to know (*_~).

YOU ALL ROCK MY WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!  SEE YOU IN CHAPTER 11!  


	12. Notes & Vodka with raspberry flavoring

Rating: R

Disclaimer:  Nothing's mine

A/N:  I hope I figured out the ellipses, thanks to some help I got from Muffy, but if not I think I can trust you people to figure it out. 

Hermione had never really taken the time to find much humor in her life.  At least, not lately.  She'd spent all her free moments thinking about her lessons, or about Ron, or about how she was being so deceitful towards her friends.

But tonight. . . everything was indescribably hysterical.

Hermione giggled as she dropped into her desk chair and grabbed a piece of parchment.  The small red clock next to her right arm only read 9:34, and she was momentarily surprised at how early it was.  

But time wasn't an issue for her tonight. 

After the unfortunate goings-on of this morning, she'd found it necessary to lie motionless on her bed for a period of three and one half hours.  All the thoughts she had been trying to squash for the past few months flowed back into her during those 210 long minutes, and she'd felt all consumed. 

Now the concept of her being in the same bed as Draco Malfoy made her giggle hopelessly.  In her current state, she could do nothing to deny the face that she'd really love to be underneath his sheets, to feel his heat and smell his skin.

Hermione closed her eyes briefly, then quickly vanquished her thoughts with another gulp of raspberry vodka.  After her time spent flopped despondently on her bed and a long shower, she'd dressed in her tiniest dress and smoothed out her hair in a desperate attempt to prove that she was still attractive.  

It had failed.  And that's when she remembered the bottle, stuffed into a far-off corner of her trunk, reserved for when she finally had sex with Ron.  It didn't provide the romance of something such as, say, champagne, but it was the only thing her parents wouldn't have missed.

And after it stopped burning all the way down her throat with every sip, it actually tasted quite good.  At any rate, it helped her forget anything she may have considered thinking about five hours earlier.

"Besides, I have new things to think about now." Hermione pulled her parchment closer and snatched up a quill.  So many thoughts were buzzing through her mind right now, and she struggled to focus on the one she wanted.

"I have to talk to him." She said out loud, gazing through the clear expanse of her vodka bottle.  "I have to understand why."  She nodded determinedly and began to write.  

Hermione jumped as someone knocked at her door, and she worked to untangle herself from her chair.

"Coming!" she cried, toppling to the floor.  

Hermione picked herself up and leaned heavily onto the door, giggling. 

"Who is it?"

When no reply came, Hermione felt herself getting angry.  "People can't just disturb other people like that," she thought, grabbing the doorknob and rendering a vicious twist upon it.

No one stood there, but a single piece of parchment sat, folded, waiting.  Hermione bent down to grab it, and then fell with a thud back onto the floor of her bedroom.  She pushed the door shut and unfolded the paper.

It was from Ron.  That much was immediately obvious from the scrawly writing she couldn't focus on and the bright blue ink that tortured her fuzzy eyes.

Hermione squeezed her eyes shut, trying to get herself to focus.  She'd had just enough alcohol to keep unsolicited thoughts away, but not quite enough to forget what those thoughts were.

"Dear Hermione." She read aloud, recognizing her name.

"I understand I'm probably the last person you want to hear from right now."  She paused to let her brain rest.  "But I feel horrible about something, and I need to let you know about it."  Hermione felt her stomach dropping.  She didn't want any more bad news right now.  

"I've apologized to you already for how I acted the night we broke up, and even though we're not talking anymore, I hope that you've taken it upon yourself to at least understand where I was coming from."

Hermione rested her head against the wall again.  All she wanted right now was more vodka.  She'd only been drunk once before, and the nice, warm feeling she remembered was what had finally convinced her to do it again tonight.

But this was nothing like before.  It made her feel senseless and alone.

"There's something about my relationship with Sara that I can hardly say I'm proud of."

Hermione's shoulders tensed.

"The night after we broke up, I met Sara.  And I was so defeated I couldn't think straight.  I slept with her less then 24 hours after our relationship ended."

Hermione read those three sentences over and over.  She couldn't fathom it being the truth.

"After, I knew I'd made a mistake.  I didn't want to tell you because I couldn't understand why I would want to hurt you any more than I already had.  But keeping it a secret was killing me, and I had to let you know everything and then allow you to re-evaluate anything we still have."

There was more, but Hermione allowed the parchment to slip from her fingers.  She couldn't manage a sensible thought, only that she wanted desperately to cry.

"I kept so many secrets from you, didn't I?" Hermione mused aloud.  "And here you are, worrying that what you've done is bad."

She crawled back over to her desk and ingested as much alcohol as she could in one gulp.  The fire was gone, and she waited for it to numb her mind and make her happy again.

"Mmm." Hermione licked her lips and leaned over her desk once again to finish writing the note.  The force behind her coherent thinking was slowly diminishing, and she hurried to make it complete.

"Perfect." Hermione tumbled over to the window and petted the owl she'd borrowed from the school earlier that day.  "You're so soft." She held out her note for the creature, watching, entranced, as he captured it in his beak.

"I need to know the truth." She informed him.  "Take that to Draco Malfoy."

The owl skittered off, and Hermione leaned against the wall.

"Draco." She mumbled, bemused.  "I've never said _that_ before."

All at once her knees became sort of weak, and she felt herself collapsing onto the hard floor.  Her bottle was still clutched in her fingers, and she brought it up to her mouth.  

"Draco." She whispered once more, smiling as the word rolled off her sedated lips.

*

When Hermione woke up an hour later, she quickly finished off her vodka before it could start to wear off.  She'd never felt quite this way before, as if she were swimming through a thick, quiet fog of something warm.

Hermione stood up clumsily, pulled on her shoes, and headed towards the door.  She lurched down the hallway, feeling the walls but not really noticing that they were there.  

Hermione refused to let the memory of Ron's note cut through her self-induced miasma of happiness.  She'd started out so helpless, on a suffocating downwards spiral.  And one bottle of vodka later, well, up was the only direction she was headed now.

Hermione reached the familiar door of the abandoned classroom she'd come to so often.  She traced the pattern of the old wood with a finger before pushing it open.

She smiled slowly as she took in the sight of Malfoy.  He had come.  Hermione made an attempt at composure as she walked over to the table and sat down across from him.

"So?"

His word broke through Hermione's comforting silence.  She raised an eyebrow.

"Did you want something?" he asked.

God, he was beautiful.  Hermione had never dared to let herself take him in before.  All those hours she'd spent cramming thoughts of Ron into her mind now seemed useless.  Those eyes, so cold, so penetrating.  His perfect lips, his clothes.  She imagined herself undressing him, picturing a look of lustful anticipation on his face.

"Why did you do it?" she heard herself asking.

"Do what?" he replied coldly.

"How could you crush me like that, after everything you knew about me?"  The only thing keeping her in this conversation was the fact that she'd rehearsed it all day.

"You're truly pathetic." He said.

"I'm not." She said, feeling her blood begin to run hotter.

"I told you, Granger.  I thought, and I was correct, that it would be a perfect reminder for you that you don't go around fucking with people.  A little lesson to prove that you can't ever change anyone, that you are always underneath the people who are above you."

"Fine." Hermione couldn't stop staring at his perfect face.  She smiled inanely and blinked a few times.

"Well, now that you know, I'll be leaving."

"Wait!" Hermione climbed messily onto the table, ignoring her dress as it slid up her thighs.  "You can't leave yet." 

She twisted into a sitting position and put on foot one either side of him, trying to lock him into his chair.  

"I still don't understand how one person can have so little warmth for anyone." She peered into his eyes and felt a chill run up her spine, despite her alcohol-induced numbness.

"It's easy when dealing with people like you." He replied.

"People like me?" she leaned forward.

"People who can't handle the simple obstacles of life.  People who need other people all the time."

"What's wrong with needing someone?" Hermione was barely thinking anymore as she imagined how his skin would look in the near-darkness that surrounded them.

He leaned forward, boring his stony gaze deep into her.

"Everything."

Hermione stared back at him with childlike innocence.

"Why are you drunk right now?" he asked.

"Because." She replied, raising her eyebrows.  

"Because why?"

"Because." Hermione sung, winking at him.

"You might want to consider pulling down your skirt."

"Oh, really?"

"Really."

"Let me ask you, Mr. Malfoy.  When _exactly_ is the last time you said _that_?" Hermione struggled to keep her balance as she leaned further forward.  "I bet it's been _forever_."  

"I'd say, more like never."

"Why do you act like this?" Hermione grinned widely.  "I mean, really, just... _why_?"

"Because I'd so rather be weak and needy like you." He said sarcastically.  "Look in the mirror, Granger.  You'll never be anything more than what you are right now."

Hermione rested her hand on his knee and giggled again.  "Why did you come here tonight?" she asked.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I mean... you obviously can't stand the sight of me.  You had _no_ reason to come.  Soooooo. . . why did you?"

"I just wanted to make sure you had no more ideas about me." 

"Ideas?" Hermione tipped her head to the side and stretched out her toes.  

"I know you thought that you were finally the magic person that was going to come along and change me for the better." Draco glared at her and pushed her foot back down.

"What are you _talking_ about?" she asked, hitting the table in confused frustration.

"I mean, don't grow so attached to things you'll never have."

"You think I wanted you?  Is that it?" 

"I think so." Draco gave her a challenging stare.  "In fact, I'd say you still do."

"Of course I wanted you." Hermione said, losing her concentration once more.  She slid forward off the table and onto his lap.

"Granger, what the fuck-"

"Shh."  The moon drifted behind a cloud, and Hermione found herself plunged into pitch darkness.  "It's okay.  Just tell me how you really feel.  I'll never, ever, _ever_ let anyone know."

"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about."

Hermione wrapped her arms around his neck and tipped her head back.

"Why are you here, _really_?" she asked.

"To finally sever all ties with you."

"Hmm." Hermione made a face of exaggerated thought.  "I think that you took care of that this morning."

"Sometimes you have to do what other people ask of you, if only it's because you feel sorry for them." 

"Oooh." Hermione said, nodding.  "I get it."  She stood up, clumsily extricating herself.  "You sound like some sort of business person thingy.  Just _relax_!"

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"I feel. . ." she paused, shook her head, then quickly pulled her dress over her head.  "I feel like this is the only way I can relate to you."

"Why do you want to relate to me?" 

Hermione dropped her dress and shook her head again.

"Because I want to understand you." She was becoming slightly emotional.

"Why do you want to understand me?"

"Don't you see?" Hermione yelled in despair, staring towards the ceiling.  She walked over to him and dropped onto his lap.  "I love you, that's why."

"What?" he stood up, sending Hermione crashing to the floor.

"I love you." Hermione smiled vacuously up at him from the floor.

"What?" he repeated again.  "You obviously don't know what you're talking about."

"I know exactly what I'm talking about," she said, grabbing his leg and stroking his leather pants.

"You're drunk.  Just go back to you room."

Hermione hauled herself to her feet and looked at him intently.

"I know you never expected this."

"That's the understatement of the fucking year."

"But I finally feel like I can tell you how I feel."

"Well, don't."

"Why don't you want me to?" Hermione slid back into her cozy, content world.  "Just tell me to stop.  You can go if you want to.  Push me off of you.  Throw me to the floor and call me a slut."

"Look-"

"I guess I'm already on the floor, aren't I?" Hermione giggled.

"Granger-"

"No one can stop you, right?  Just do what you want to."  She giggled again as she hauled herself to her feet.

"This isn't. . ."

"Isn't what?"

When he didn't reply, Hermione wrapped her arms around his neck again and leaned in to tell him a very important something.

"I came her tonight to- to yell at you.  But I can't be mad at you anymore."

"Why not?"

"You know." Hermione let her mouth drop onto his and reveled in the tingle that converged with her mouth.  She made the mistake of letting him support all her weight, and she felt herself toppling to the floor.

"I'm drunk.  Why don't you take advantage of me?" she whispered into his neck from her position above him.

"What the fuck were you drinking?" he asked.

"Vodka." Hermione moved her face closer to his, feeling a surge of heat cut through her body.  "You can probably still taste it on my lips..." she trailed off as she pressed her mouth to his once more.  She opened her mouth to let his tongue in and delighted in the burn that spread along her body.

The darkness surrounding them was thick enough for Hermione to bite into.  She couldn't honestly explain to herself what she was doing.

"Ron sent me a letter today," she began, pressing closer to him and breathing in his scent.  "And he told me that he didn't even wait _one whole day _after he broke up with me to have sex with that, you know, other girl."

She moved her hands up her back and unfastened her bra.  

"So I really don't think I'm interested in him anymore." Hermione felt the words tumbling off her disconnected lips as she slid the bra straps down her arms.  "But I can't really think straight, anyway."

"Hmm." Draco said.

"I've imagined what it'd be like with you so many times." Hermione sighed.  She was starting to lose her giggly edge.  "And I'm not going to be drunk for much longer."

"I see."

"You don't have to worry." Hermione said, closing her eyes as her skin started to drip.  

"I can't stop this burning I have for you." She said, letting her hands fall to the waist of his pants.  She was so consumed her words were becoming inaudible.  

"I'm sorry you feel that way."

"What was so different about me that you could never just use me and leave me behind?" she asked, focusing on one of her earlier thoughts that was starting to edge back in.

"I hate you." He muttered.  "You were always untouchable to me."

"You sound like you're waging some sort of war with yourself." Hermione's pulse was pounding.  She could feel the weight of the decision she was making even through her haze.  It didn't matter anymore.  She could hate herself all she wanted tomorrow.  Right now, she was lying on top of him. . . and unbuttoning his shirt.

"I am." He replied simply.

"Did you really want to hurt me this morning?  Or were you just scared?"

"I don't know." He drew in a sharp breath as she unzipped his pants.  Normally an honest response would've shocked Hermione, but she was so consumed it was all starting to make sense to her.

She could feel a pressure on every inch of her body.  Her head felt like it was floating somewhere near the ceiling.

"When's the last time you did something that you didn't have to force yourself to do?" she whispered, sliding two of her surprisingly cold fingers just under the waistband of his boxers.  Her pulse doubled as she heard him moan against her touch.

"Right now." He whispered, after what seemed like a thousand years.

Hermione gasped slightly as she felt his hands on the small of her back.  All of a sudden the blackness of the room was draining into her head, and the heat was prohibiting any sort of breath.

She couldn't feel his touch, couldn't focus on his face.  She drifted back down to reality only when his muscles suddenly became very rigid.

"What is it?" she muttered breathily, catching just a glimpse of something strange in his eyes. 

"I don't know if-" he paused, shaking his head.  "You aren't going to remember anything tomorrow."

"So we can do it again," she urged, spreading her hands across his skin.  "You-you told me, remember?  This morning?  It's, you know, allowed."

His eyes darkened and he drew in a breath.

"What do you know about my rules?" he demanded.

"Don't fight with me!" she cried.  "I don't want to fight you anymore.  I don't want to fight myself."  Hermione felt her body relaxing as she pressed closer to him.  She closed her surprisingly tired eyes and ran her fingertips over his arms.

"Get the fuck off of me." He said quietly.

"You don't want me off of you," she said calmly.  "I know it."  Hermione stopped moving as she fell into a different sort of sleep, a sleep induced from fatigue and alcohol and sweetened by the strange, indescribable thing she had for a mattress.

*

Sorry I didn't get to the good stuff again.

Thanks to:

JulieAnn Felton, j.j. alan, luna-cee, courtney-love, Courtney, Sarkie, kittydemon, Emma, *karly*, Kay, willowwiccancantara, Kring, Kerdes Vernel, HaaHaaHaa15, Liz, bon-bon, some1, americasyankee, walk-like-an-egyptian, Faerie Lover, Mary Stardust, Athena Tudor, Muffy, Kristina, Navy Converse, katarina evanla, novasenshi, casper, rubberducks, Elitea-LeFay, bumblebee, Pinochio, Sora Ketsueki, mimi, DrAcOLuVeR79, silent-sirena, joyce, Twilight Moon Child, Bubbles, Dragon Eyes, DRACOSMISTRESS, KeZ 'n' TzAmZ, Young Golden Unicorn, Natzlin, jenn, Alanna Roseguard, sam, ragcey, Rebecca, JeanB, RuBy MoOn, Raven, Mistress Desdemona, Amora-Ryuko, Fiery Slut, Varada, Amanda, MsLessa, ex-jlo, christine, . . ., bessorla, Natasha, heather, ghetto superstar, minda, lisawescott, Luna, lil-chikki, Aaliyah, Crystalline Lily, Mia, Dreaming One, Herbie, Silver Surya, sugar, hyper-shark, mendie, and Sakura1287 (btw, I love your reviews, and 1287 is the combination to my old bike lock)   

Okay, thanks for reviewing, I really do appreciate it.  And I hope I get to write some smut eventually.  The story's not going to be that much longer. . .  I'm guessing about 3 chapters.  But I should get them out faster now that school's almost over.

*If you don't get e-mails for updates and you want them **please** e-mail me with your address.  I always feel so bad when people tell me they didn't get updates.


	13. Love & some setup for the end sob Dr...

"He's gotta be the tragic figure standing in the rain, mourning the loss of his beloved. So down comes the rain, right on cue."  

Sunday, 4:14 p.m.

It was still raining.  

How long it had been raining for was something Hermione couldn't judge.  She had probably been awake when it started.  But she just couldn't remember.

She'd seen a movie once, some crazy animated thing where people were flying around a futuristic space that was just like Earth.  Maybe they had even been on Earth.  Maybe not.  And the main character had, at some point, said: "The flow is more important. . . not power.  You have to be like the water."

Hermione thought back to that quote now.  When she first heard those words they had struck has as very honest, very believable.  You have to be like the water.  You can't try to dominate everything; you just have to go along with life sometimes.

She felt like the water now, like the droplets that were pelting the sides of the school.  She felt as though she had once been a river, or something, not particularly strong but with a good sense of what she was flowing towards.  

But now, instead of that, she was just thousands of tiny beads of water.  Tumbling forth erratically . . . and eventually she would reach the end of her short lifespan by smacking hard into some sort of obstruction.   

A crack of thunder filled Hermione's ears and she sank slowly beneath the effervescent bubbles in her bathwater.

Admittedly, she'd already hit her roadblock.  Everything she had been clinging to these past few months had exploded into millions of tiny, meaningless particles this morning.

Only a few short hours ago.  The last true moments of her delusional fantasy life as a Sex-Goddess-in-training.

Sunday, 5:52 a.m.

"Excuse me!  Excuse me, what do you think you're _doing_?"

Hermione let her eyelids flutter slowly, painfully upwards.

"Huh?"

"I asked you what you're doing."  The angry, domineering face of an angry, domineering fifth-year prefect loomed into Hermione's line of vision.

"What are you talking about?"  She struggled to sit up, exhaling sharply while becoming aware of the pain and stiffness that apparently had overtaken her body.

"Do you know where you are?"  The prefect looked down at her reproachfully.

"Um, no," Hermione mumbled sarcastically.

"Well, just to uh, _let you know_, you seem to have fallen asleep in the hallway.  I suggest you go back to your room and freshen up, to say the least, before a teacher comes by and gives you detention."

"I haven't done anything wrong."  Hermione was still struggling to shake the cobwebs away.

"You were obviously out of your room all last night.  Plus, your, uh, _outfit_ suggests that you weren't exactly taking part in something entirely wholesome.  It's a miracle that you haven't been caught, well, not until now that is-"

Hermione gasped suddenly and lunged forward, clinging to the girl's robes to keep from smacking to the ground.

"Malfoy.  Draco Malfoy."  She blinked hard in an attempt to distill the bitter pain swirling through her skull.  "I need to see him.  It's important.  Can you tell me where he is?"

The girl tried to shake free of Hermione's grasp.  "Isn't he in Slytherin?  Why don't you check there?"

"Slytherin.  Right."  Hermione scrambled to her feet and took off down the hallway.

"Sure."  The prefect stood in Hermione's wake, shaking her head.

Sunday, 6:23 a.m.

She had gotten lost.  More than a few times.

The Slytherin dormitories seemed to have disappeared.  Hermione shook her head again, forcing herself to think.  It was crazy, sure.  She wasn't even supposed to be down here.  And there was no way to get through the door to the common room, much less find where Malfoy slept.  And that prefect had been right, of course.  It really was a miracle that she hadn't been caught.

Of course, it was still early.  Anyone who got up this early had to be mad.  

But she needed to find him.  It was a desperate situation.  She couldn't remember much about the night before, but she had a feeling that he would have the answers.

"Oh, hello.  You're here for the reading?"

"What?"  Hermione spun around.  A small, pale looking girl who had to be in her first or second year stood nearby, gazing unblinkingly at Hermione.

"The reading.  You look like you could really use some answers."

"No, no.  I'm fine."  Hermione forced her eyes in the opposite direction.  Was this a dream?  What was this girl talking about?

"My room's just through here.  It will only take a second for me to get things ready."

"Oh.  Okay."  Hermione followed, suddenly very interested in what this girl had to say.

"I like your dress.  It's very unofficial."

"Thanks."  She became aware of her outfit for the first time.  The same red dress from before, or so she thought.  What had really happened?

"I'm Astrid."  The girl gestured to a seat.  "This is my room.  I apologize for the cold.  I never wanted to be in Slytherin, you know.  It really is just so frigid down here."

"You're in Slytherin?"  Hermione snapped back to reality.  

"Of course.  Just look around." 

Astrid sat down and lit a bunch of candles with her wand.

"So, Melanie.  Please just tell me what you're here to find out."

Hermione tried to stifle a yawn.  "Isn't it a little early?"  The sun hadn't even risen all the way.

"You made the appointment, Melanie.  I woke up solely to accommodate you."

"Thanks."  Hermione glanced around distractedly, wondering what exactly she'd gotten herself into.  "Oh.  Who's Melanie?"

"You are."  Astrid looked confused.  "Melanie Locks, right?  You talked to me last week about a private reading?"

"I hate divination, you know.  I dropped out years ago."

"This is nothing like divination.  I truly have a gift."

"Okay."  Hermione felt so muddled at the moment, all she could do was go along with it.  "Tell me what you see."

"You have something.  Of his, I mean."

"Of whose?"  Hermione's head began to pound again.

"The boy.  The one we spoke about."

"Oh.  Sure."  Hermione unclasped the necklace from around her neck, one she'd gotten for her birthday.  "It's his.  He gave it to me."

"This isn't his."

"Yeah it is."

"It says 'To Hermione.  Love, Grandma.'  Would you like to tell me who Hermione is?"

"Oh.  She's my, um, friend.  I must have taken that by mistake, or something."

"This necklace bleeds heartache onto my hands."  Astrid closed her eyes.  "Hermione is experiencing so much pain right now."

Hermione raised her eyebrows.  This was exactly why she had quit divination in the first place. . .

"Yeah.  Sure."  She rubbed her aching temples.  

Astrid opened her eyes again.  "Tell Hermione to be wary of her choices.  She can either put out the fire with ice or burn the water."  

"That makes no sense.  You can't burn water."

Astrid sighed.  "It guess it doesn't make sense, really.  It will mean something personal to her, I assure you."

Hermione sighed.  If only she knew.  "Well, wow, I've got to go.  Thanks."

"But Melanie, we haven't talked about you yet."

"It's cool.  I'll come back."

Hermione hurried for the door, suddenly desperate to get out.  She cast a last glance back at Creepy Astrid, a slight chill running up her spine.

She sighed once the door had closed behind her, taking in the sights of the common room.

"Well, I never expected to see you here."

Hermione jumped.  The temporary distraction Astrid had offered slipped out of her mind as she remembered her purpose, her reason for coming here.

"I bet you didn't."

A blast of thunder sounded all of a sudden, and Hermione realized that it had never truly been light out.

"So, what _are_ you doing here?"

"I need you to tell me what happened last night."  Hermione followed Malfoy, who lifted himself out of an armchair and started to walk away.  She realized how little he was wearing, just his boxers, and forced herself to be sick at the sight of him.

"Don't you remember?"

"No, I don't."  She tried to keep her voice low.  "Look, it's almost time for people to wake up.  Can't you just tell me what went on so I can leave and get back to my room?"

"I haven't been to sleep at all, and I'm really very tired.  Can't we do this later, or maybe, never?"

"After what you've done to me, don't you think that you owe me some sort of explanation?"

"Why is everything always about you?" He paused to think with mock drama.  "So you got a taste of the way things really are and it's just too much for you.  What do you want me to do about it?"

"Things aren't really the way you think they are. You live in your own little fantasy world, Malfoy, where people are your playthings and reality is just a boring and uninteresting possibility that you hope you'll never have to deal with."

"Look, Granger, I'm done with you and your psychoanalysis.  I've tried my best to get rid of you but you just keep coming back for more."

"I'm coming back for answers!" she cried, following him into his room.  "Because I know what happened with us on Saturday morning.  And I don't know much about what happened Saturday night, but I woke up today in a part of the school that I had never even seen before."

"And?"

"And I'm curious to know how I got there."

"And you think I have the answers?"

"I know you have the answers."

"I thought you didn't know anything."

Hermione blinked, wincing as her head practically contorted itself with pain.  

"I know that this has been the worst, longest weekend of my entire _life._  Starting Monday I never want to have anything to do with you ever again.  So I have maybe. . . seventeen hours to rid myself of you."

"Seeing as how you have so much time, you won't mind if I sleep a while?"

Hermione ran her hands through her hair.  "I do mind, actually.  Just tell me what happened."

Her desperation seemed to affect him; he paused and turned to look at her.  

"Here."  He grabbed a bottle from his dresser and handed it to her.  

"What is it?" she sighed, exasperated.

"It's for your head."  Draco shrugged.  "It might help."

Hermione quickly uncorked it and swallowed the liquid in one gulp.

"I hope that wasn't actually poison in disguise."

"I'm not that kind of person."  Malfoy reached out for the empty bottle, which Hermione quietly dropped in his hand.  She felt relaxed all of a sudden and dropped into a chair.

"Have you ever seen the Thomas Crown Affair?" she rested her chin in her hand.

"No."  Malfoy sat on his bed.

"The old one, I mean.  There's this scene with Thomas Crown and this girl, um, Vicky, I think.  Well, they're in his room and they start kissing and everything starts swirling and all these colors form and start swirling right along with them. . . like some sort of psychedelic love scene."

"So?"

"So, I never understood the movie.  I must've been too young.  But all I know is that Thomas Crown was a thief of sorts, some bored rich guy who cheated the system for fun.  And Vicky was the only girl who could figure him out.  But of course she fell in love with him."

"And?"

"And that's all I remember about last night.  A lot of swirling, a lot of color.  And I have a strange feeling I may have finally figured you out, too.  But I can't remember."

"You didn't find out anything about me."

"So what's the problem?  Why can't you tell me?"

Malfoy leaned onto his bed, blinking as another crack of thunder sounded.  

Hermione sighed.  "I remember that when we first decided to do those lessons, we said that it wasn't going to change anything.  You would still be you; I would still be me.  We wouldn't change and we wouldn't owe each other anything."

"I don't owe you anything."

"That's not the point.  The point is that I have changed.  Weather or not I want to admit it, you changed me."  Her words had suddenly fallen to a whisper.  "I just want to know if maybe I changed you, too."

"You didn't."  Malfoy responded automatically.

"So what happened?"

"Nothing."

"Look, I came here to find you, so you could tell me the truth.  Not to make myself the victim here, but you did try to destroy me Saturday morning.  And I should be crying my eyes out in my room, hating you and wondering how one person could just be so cruel.  Like I always have before." 

"So why aren't you?"

"Because it was different.  I could see it in your eyes.  You were scared."  

"It wasn't like that at all."

"Come on, Malfoy.  You didn't know what was going to happen and it _scared_ you."

"Don't give yourself so much credit, please.  It takes a lot more than someone like you to scare me."

"I don't think that's true.  I really don't.  I also don't believe that you had that all planned out from the beginning.  I've tried to feel sad about it, I really have.  I even did for a while.  But ever since I woke up this morning, it's all just sort of disappeared.  You're terrified of yourself, and you're terrified of me.  I know that now.  You're scared that you could be happy someday.  And then how would you get what you wanted?"

"Believe it or not, some people don't want to skip off into the sunset next to their true love and live happily ever after.  Some people have to face their realities.  And what I would consider reality is definitely not what people like you consider reality.  I'm not scared of facing my life.  I'm just scared that someday I'll have to be afraid of mindless, do-gooding people such as yourself."

"No one is fearless, Malfoy."  Hermione slid out of her chair and sat on the opposite corner of the bed.  "Would it scare you if I, maybe, started to take off my dress?"

"Of course not."

Hermione lifted the material up her thighs, sliding it inch by inch until it was on the floor.

"It doesn't scare you that I'm practically naked?"

"Well, I've definitely never had a naked girl on my bed before, that's for sure."

"That's not what I meant."

"Well, then, what did you mean?"

"I just meant that if I were you, I'd be a little scared.  What if I asked you to make love to me right now?"

"I would say no."

"But why?  Is it because I'm one of the only girls in the school who doesn't idolize you?  Because I wouldn't be completely submissive to your so-called magic?  If you couldn't call all the shots, would you honestly be able to please me?"

"Let's hope we never have to find out."

Hermione slid her body until it was positioned right next to his.  

"I remember what happened last night."

"But you said-"

"I don't remember it too clearly."  She bit her lip.  "But I remember telling you that I loved you.  I remember that, definitely."

"I'm sorry you have to have such a memory," he said, sarcastically.

"I wasn't even scared to say it.  The only thing I was scared of is that you wouldn't feel the same way."

"So why would you come all the way to my room if you already had the answers?"

"Because I wanted the truth."  Hermione looked him in the eye.

"So do you love me?" he raised an eyebrow questioningly.

"I don't know.  I would hate to think that I do.  Because where would I be then?  We can't even be in the same room without trying to hurt one another."

"So why are you constantly subjecting yourself to the pain of my presence?"  Malfoy turned his eyes to meet hers.

Hermione shrugged.  "I'm hoping for the answers, I guess.  Not just about last night.  Because I know what I did and I know what we almost did.  Again.  And I know that there can only be complicated discussions and arguments to follow, things for us to say so we can temporarily remove ourselves from the situation."

"And?"

"And I don't care anymore.  I don't care if it's painful, or embarrassing.  I keep coming back to you because I'm hoping that maybe. . ." Hermione felt her throat closing up.  "I'm hoping that maybe you'll kiss me with the pretense of hurting me, and somewhere along the way you'll just forget about it."

"You want me to love you?"  His words fell clumsily into the dimly lit silence.  Hermione had never felt more nervous.  Why was she doing this?  He obviously had only the intent to hurt her, and here she was, opening herself up again and leaving plenty of space for new, deeper wounds.  

"I know that you don't love people."  Hermione felt extremely tiny next to him.  "And I know that you don't want people to love you.  But you're the only person I've ever been totally honest with.  And, to tell the truth, it's really not all bad.  I guess it's just unfortunate that it had to be you."

He shrugged, and Hermione grew tense as the silence between them expanded.

"Maybe you should go." 

"Yeah."  Hermione bit her lip again.  She had been expecting it, of course.  But a tiny sliver of her mind thought that maybe he would feel the same way.  She reached out to pull her dress off the floor.

"You're not who everyone thinks you are, you know," she whispered quietly.  "If there's one thing I've learned at all, that's what it is."

"So, who am I, then?"  His tone had grown slightly fiercer.

Hermione shrugged.  "I was hoping that you'd let me find out."

"People don't just 'find out' about me.  It doesn't work that way."

"Nothing ever works any way for you, Malfoy."  Hermione reached for the doorknob.  "As soon as I could think clearly this morning, I knew this was what I had to do.  No matter what you said to me, I knew what I had to say to you."

"Stay away from me," he said, after a moment's pause.  "Just stay away from me."

"Sure."  Hermione pulled open the door.  "Of course."

She turned to leave, feeling numb and careless.  Hopefully, maybe, he would have the decency to keep this a secret.  If not, so what.  She was gone from this school in three weeks.  It didn't really seem to matter anymore.  Her last chance at something to really remember had just slipped out of reach.

Sunday, 2:29 p.m.

The walk back to her room had been a long one.  Thankfully, no one had been sitting in the Slytherin common room.  No one had stopped her in the hallway.  She really had become invisible.

Not that it mattered.  She'd had enough of love.  Three times in a row, and all it had done was break her heart over and over and over again.

A stack of unfinished homework waited for her, and Hermione lifted page after page, moving and writing methodically, unemotionally.

Ron had someone.  Harry and Ginny were together.  It was too much to think about.  Even worse was the fact that she had no one to talk about it with.  No one in the school would ever look at the situation from an unbiased viewpoint.  She had fallen for the enemy.  Someone who had made the lives of lots and lots of people miserable.  Someone who seemed to have no heart and no conscience.  Someone so thickly armored that not even a confession of love was allowed in.

And last night was so blurry in her mind, but it seemed as though he had almost wanted to be with her.  Right before things had gone black, hadn't he said something?  Something good?  

Hermione shook her head.  She couldn't remember.  And that was okay; it was really better that way.  She curled her knees up and rested her chin on them.

She wished she could talk to Ron.  Even though it would just be talking, she wanted to hear his voice again, and lose herself in his eyes.  If only he could love her again. . .

Hermione shook away the thought.  She'd grown out of that love a long time ago.  Even with the note he'd left her yesterday, she couldn't feel bitter or angry towards him.  They were friends, hopefully.  Their friendship had always been important.  

A tear started to roll down her cheek.  This whole weekend had just been too much to handle at once.  At least Malfoy had let her go easily.  She appreaciated the gesture, and just hoped it wouldn't be too long before he would do something to make her hate him again.

But it had to be soon.  Hermione knew she couldn't leave Hogwarts with this harsh feeling inside of her.  She couldn't even explain what had made her say those things, why she had treated the situation as though he were a normal boy and they were together under normal circumstances.  But nothing was normal when she was around him.

Hermione heard the rain spattering against the school; she closed her blurry eyes and wished that the sky would turn dark and angry.  She wished that it would storm, over and over again.  Forever.

*

It's still not over, really.  Maybe two more.  I really think that'll be it.  But I actually have it planned, so that's pretty cool.  And. . . I imagine I must credit the films mentioned, the T.C.A. and the Cowboy Bebop movie (always a pleasure, definitely), and The Sandman, which I believe is a comic book.  I don't remember.  The only thing that sticks in my mind is the quote.


End file.
